Page 191 of Change
But what were we supposed to work on?
“Protecting your thoughts,” Titus replied. “I’m not sure if there’s anything we can do, but there’s probably something. However, I’ve asked around to other shifters who had mind-reading abilities with their mates, and they’ve brought up ways for you to keep certain things private.”
“It’s not that.” I sighed, even though it was one of the things that bothered me.
“Then what is it?” he asked. “You’ve been upset aboutthisever since we’ve gotten back. You think about it all the time. You knew I could read your thoughts as a dragon—what makes this so different?”
Because he wasn’t always a dragon.
“Okay.” He sounded put out. “I get that. So—”
I was ashamed.
His arms tightened and his breath quickened as he asked, “Why?”
“B-because…” I hated myself for stuttering at a moment like this, but things were too close to the surface to ignore. I’d been trying to avoid thinking about it for this reason—I didn’t want him to find out. But now that it was only the two of us and there were no distractions, it seemed impossible to control my thoughts anymore.
I’d decided that I was going to try, but that didn’t mean I’d be any good at it. But even more than that were the other implications that being a mate entailed. Even though I’d been trying to be brave—trying to pretend it was no big deal and to ignore everything that had happened—just the very thought of sex still terrified me. Even morenowthan ever before.
I might be able to be brave about other things, but not this.
And here we were, on this very fancy date, and in the romance novels, fancy dates usually led tothings.
No one deserved my mess.
“Princess.” He ran his arms down my shoulders, then guided me to face him. “Remember when I said we’d talk later about what being with me meant?”
I nodded, my mouth suddenly going dry in apprehension over the recollection. It was there, after he’d found me in the woods when I’d run away from Julian and Damen, that he told me that, one day, we’d have to discuss the whole ‘virgin’ thing.
But I wasn’t sure I was ready for it to be today.
“It’ll be today, and you’re ready.” He grabbed my waist, setting me into a seat on the balcony. He caged me in between his arms as he leaned in, and my breath quickened in apprehension. “We’re not going to have sex.”
It took a long moment for his words to register, but when they did, I could only stare at him dumbly.
I didn’t understand. The dragon babies.
“There’s nothing to not understand.” He grabbed my arm and rubbed his stubble against the inside of my wrist. Titus’s eyes were dark and his voice husky as he said, “Whenwe finally get together as true mates, we’re not going to have sex.”
Still, though.
“What we’ll have is more than that.” His eyes didn’t leave mine as he moved his mouth to the inside of my wrist. “I’ve only ever been with you for one reason and one reason only. You’re the only one I’ve ever felt this way for. And it’ll be the same for you—nothing you’ve done in the past will be like what the two of us share.”
But there’s the nudity factor, and the mechanics. I was no stranger to that.
“What has been done to you were acts of violence. Technically, yes, you’ve had sex. But that is nothing like what’s in our future.” Titus stepped closer as he grabbed the back of my head. “Now do you understand?”
I looked up at him, really,reallytrying to get what he was saying. But, no.
All I knew was that I felt safe with him now, especially after what we’d gone through together. I trusted him with my life. But, still, sex was something entirely different.
His gaze darkened, focusing on my mouth, and before I could even think about it, he lowered his face toward mine. However, he didn’t kiss me, like I expected. Rather he’d begun to nuzzle at the skin under my jaw.
I gasped, bringing my hands up to pull at the front of his shirt as his teeth grazed lightly over my neck. He was barely touching me, and my blood was already boiling, and my pulse raced as the wetness of his mouth closed over my skin, but it wasn’t from fear.
“I’m in control right now.” Titus’s words sounded so distant to my ears. The focus of my attention was pinpointed on that one location, and, gradually, to where his hands were trailing down my back. It was maddingly slow, and my breath hitched in apprehension of what he might do next. “But you’re not scared.”
Hearing Titus observe and discuss my own thoughts was a little bit unnerving, but somewhat interesting in a way I didn’t expect.
