Page 24 of Reflections of Peonies
“No.” I pulled back. My heart stuttered dangerously as my mouth tore from his. Blackness crept into the edges of my vision. It wasn’t Damen over me anymore. Instead, it washim. I couldn’t see from fear and pain, and my arms and legs felt heavy.
I was going to be sick.
Damen had frozen over me, and I could barely hear his formless words. Everything felt distant and unreal. My thoughts raced, and I tried to grasp anything that might keep me safe.
Then I remembered.
“Pineapple,” I gasped. I was so grateful for Julian’s brilliant thinking. “Pineapple, pineapple, pineapple!”
The weight vanished, and Damen was gone.
Even so, it felt like an eternity before my heart stopped thundering in my ears. The darkness took longer to fall away from my eyes, and a hollow feeling remained when the panic subsided.
The room slowly returned to focus: the bright white ceiling and plain walls. I was alone on the bed, and my limbs felt weak as I rolled to my side and wiped my eyes with my shaking arms.
My face and neck were wet, and I hadn’t even realized I’d been crying.
Then I remembered Damen, and the silence caused me to forget about myself. I sat up.
He sat on a chair on the other side of the room, his face in his hands and elbows braced against his knees. I’d never seen him so still. The line of strain that radiated from him was almost palpable, and a dark energy emanated from his general direction.
I’d upset him.
My pulse thrummed. I didn’t mean to make him angry. “D-D-Damen?”
His head snapped up, and his face was unreadable as his gaze met mine. The expression faded, turning into concern. “Bianca.”
Within a blink, he was kneeling beside me. He’d started to reach for me but paused. “Are you all right?” he asked instead. He seemed to regret his words the second he asked and muttered, “That’s a stupid question, of course…”
I wasn’t sure what to say.
He had to think I was crazy. There was no way I hadn’t ruined everything.
But as he held my gaze, I realized he wasn’t expecting me to say anything. I wasn’t sure why, but I was beginning to suspect he didn’t think any less of me.
“Do you mind if…” he began, attention moving over my face. There was a slight hesitation in his voice as he continued. “Do you want me to hold you? Or would you rather be alone?”
I wasn’t sure what possessed me to do it, but I raised my arms to him. He wasted no time climbing on the bed and pulling me into his lap.
“Oh, baby,” he said in a sad, rumbly voice. He held me against him so tightly that I might break. “I’m so, so sorry.”
He was shaking. “It-it’s not your fault,” I said, my voice wavering, and his hold grew even tighter. “I’ll be okay.”
“Youwillbe okay.” It almost sounded like a command. There was not an ounce of doubt in his voice. “Because you’re the strongest person I know.”
I couldn’t stop shivering. I wasn’t certain why he’d say something so strange.
But I had no energy left to argue. These episodes always left me feeling weak. It took everything I had to rest my face against his chest and focus on his breathing.
He was wrong, but it was nice of him to say. It made me feel a little less pathetic, in any case.
Miles POV
Jonathon ignored me when I reached out, and—since there was no way I was at his level yet—there was zero chance I’d be able tobring him back under my control right now. I had to think of another way to help Bianca.
They didn’t understand. Bianca was fae, and fae were not meant to be imprisoned. Keeping her trapped—and forced to confront her trauma—was the furthest thing from helpful. Plus, our quintet was different from all others. She would only get better if she was with us. Only then could our bond support her and she could move forward.
I needed to find some way to get her out of there.
