Page 132 of Brambles and Bellflowers
“I—I do,” I said as my mouth went dry. Although, he had some nerve in asking for trust when he’d stabbed me with a thorn.
“Good. Because I need your help one last time.” He held up the potion, and his expression sterned as he said, “I’m going to do the spell. I need to drink this. I will be pulled into a trance. Since you’re here, I need you to keep an eye out.”
“For what?” I asked, pressing my fingers into the dirt. Did this mean he’d give me the knife again? I could find us a late-night snack—
“Not for wildlife.” He shot me a knowing look. “For me.”
I tilted my head. “What?”
Miles sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Look, this spell allows me to face my shadow self—to confront the parts of me that’d been holding back my abilities before so that I canmore fully access Tu. He’s…” Miles paused, mouth twisting, as he glared at the ground. “He can be a pain sometimes, so, well…”
So, he had similar issues with Tu?
He looked back at me. “You know how hard it can be. When they speak to you, it’s like being confronted by a long-forgotten friend. You long to lean in to that feeling because, deep down, it’s familiar, and you know they’re a part of who you are. But it’s also terrifying. Their presence challenges the way we see ourselves. What if we can’t live up to that expectation?”
The wind played with his hair as he spoke, and the wayward strands fluttered softly. “You’re afraid to fully embrace it,” he continued, his gaze distant. “You fear that in doing so, you might lose a part of yourself.”
“Miles…” I began, my chest heavy. I’d felt so alone—why didn’t I think someone else felt the same?
“But that’s exactly why we need to understand the differences and similarities between them and us,” he continued. “And to embrace the aspects that define the foundations of our personalities. We need to do our best, relying on each other, and our Officers, to guide us through.”
“We—” I began, and he looked back at me. “We’re not that much alike. Right? Titus couldn’t always have likedHello Kitty.”
The corners of Miles’s lips lifted in a smirk. “Did you like the crown from the princess game?”
I sat back. I’d asked about Titus—why was he turning it back to me? But I answered anyway, “Yes…”
“You know that’s yours?” he continued with a shrug.
I placed my hand over my heart. What were the odds? No wonder wearing it felt so right.
However, there was a problem with this bit of information.
“What?” A surge of possessiveness raced through me. “Then why did Titus have it?”
“In fact”—His grin grew wider—“most of those pieces belong to you. You decided to let Jin—or Titus—safeguard your treasure.”
I pressed my lips together.
If that was the case, how did Maria get to mystuff? Titus and I needed to have a serious discussion about his security.
“And your phone,” Miles pointed out as he bounced his knee nervously. “Do you like that it’s bedazzled? Mu enjoys looking at shiny things.”
“Don’t saybedazzled.” My heart was pounding.
“But you also like dresses, lace, and the color pink,” Miles continued. “Those were never things that he’d been drawn to. There’s more—but there’s an example of your uniqueness that makes you separate from Mu. We don’t need to be afraid of our past selves because they only enhance, but don’t define, who we are.”
We…
He was trying to convince himself as much as me.
“You don’t want to face your fears,” he said with a deep breath. He looked at the glass vial placed on the ground between us. “I know exactly how that goes.”
“Is it dangerous?” I whispered.
He swallowed and nodded. “There’s always an element of danger when doing magic like this. But I have to try.”
I touched his arm. “You can do it,” I told him. “And don’t worry. I’ll stay with you the whole time.”
