Page 144 of Bitten & Burned
“I love you for it.”
“But you hate that you do.” The words felt bitter in my mouth. But I still said them. Bitter or not, they were still true.
His eyes closed. Just for a second. Then he shook his head, fierce and trembling.
“No. I don’t hate anything to do with you.” He pulled in a breath, steadying himself. “I love you. Full stop.” He swallowed, jaw clenched. “What I hate is that I don’t deserve to love you. That’s what guts me. That’s what twists me up inside. But that’s not your problem. That’s on me. And I had no right to say it to you and bring you into that.”
He looked at me like he was pleading with the universe. “You didn’t ask for any of my damage. And gods know, you don’t need it.”
The room went still. Quil’s confession lingered in the air, tender and aching.
I waited—just a breath—for Vael to say something. Anything.
But he didn’t.
Not a word.
Not even a step closer.
Just silence.
And it hurt more than it should have. More than I’d ever admit.
So I nodded once. Swallowed the lump in my throat. And pretended I hadn’t been hoping for something from him, too. Something I knew I wouldn’t get.
Not tonight.
Maybe not ever.
I was grateful for what I did get. From Dmitri. And from Quil. I knew that was hard for him. And I turned towardss him, moving closer and wrapping my arms around him. “I love you too,” I whispered, quietly so only he could hear me. “Gods help me, I love you too. So much.”
His breath caught, and I felt him relax; his body eased against mine. His arms tightened around me, holding me close for just a moment, before he released me.
I kissed his cheek, pressed my forehead to his for a long moment. “I need to—” My voice cracked on the words.
“Yeah, I know,” He said softly. “Go. I’ll be there when you need me… Anton’s in his quarters, he’s waiting if you need someone.”
I looked down, realized I still was only wearing my chemise. I grabbed Dmitri’s robe from the chair nearby. I pulled it tighter around me, and went to the door. I slipped out almost silently, thanking the gods that no one tried to stop me. I didn’t think I could handle explaining myself right now. I just… needed to be somewhere else.
And I didn’t want to think.
He’d said Anton was waiting for me.
Perfect. Because I needed to be with Anton.
Twenty-One
YOU’RE SO MEAN
Kravenspire, Sol, Verdune
26 Ebry, Year 810
I just…needed to be somewhere else.
And I didn’t want to think.
He’d said Anton was waiting for me.
