Page 73 of Where the Dark Knelt
“Come here, let me hold you, it’ll help you relax.”Really?I shook my head. “Why did we bother with the safe word if you’re not going to need it?” He smirked.
Breathing out slowly I moved nervously beside him, my knees tucked up near his leg. His arm enveloped me, his hand resting on my belly.
Feeling nervous, I bit my thumb nail, and he shrugged himself down a bit to make himself more comfortable. He paid no attention to me, until he took my thumb out of mymouth and laced his fingers with mine to stop me from biting it.
After a few minutes, I’d convinced myselfthat this was as innocent as with Will, and I kind of melded into his side. I was aware of his breathing and heartbeat, both were steady. He was right, it was comforting.
When I woke up, Alfie was stroking my hair.The television shone a blank blue screen indicating that the movie had ended. I began to move away, and Alfie held me at his side with his strong arm running the length of me. “Shush, it’s okay, you fell asleep, no rush,” he whispered. I lay back, and kind of drifted asleep again.
Hours later, I woke again, still lying on the couch with a soft throw over me. Alfie was nowhere in sight. I crept around, but the house was still and in darkness, except for a light upstairs.
I picked my way upstairs, and when I stood on the second from the top stair, it creaked.I’d heard it before, but only remembered after I stood on it this time. Alfie’s room door was ajar, and he was lying naked, chest down on top of his bed, his head facing the door.
Looking devastatingly handsome lying there, Alfie’s strong, muscular back made himlook like something I would have expected to see flicking through a men’s fitness magazine.
Staringlongingly at the complex man I had fallen in love with, I wanted to cry. He looked so peaceful and carefree lying there, and I wondered how it was possible that he could look even more stunning as he slept.
Resisting the urge to lie down beside him, I swallowed hard. Alfie had kept his word. I was pleased that I meant enough for him to respect my feelings, even if he had nothing other than sexual feelings of his own around our relationship.
Sneaking out of his house, I slipped behind the wheel ofmy car.It was after one in the morning. I drove home and don’t really remember getting into bed, I was bone tired.
Feeling a little better about Alfie, that he could be in my life, even if it wasn’t the ‘hearts-and-flowers romantic relationship I wanted, I was more confident about trying to do the ‘friends without the benefits’ thing after that evening.
Trying to beplatonic friends wasn’t going to be easy with him though.
Would I be able to suppress my feelings for him?I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but I really wanted to try.
I’d enjoyedjust spending time with him. He was funny and charming, and seemed to enjoy just hanging with me.
The alarm buzzed loudly. The display flashed that it was 6:30a.m. I groaned and rolled over. Stretching out, I remembered my time with Alfie last night and felt happier about the pending day. I willed myself to slide out from under the sheets and get into the shower.
Soap cascadeddown my body, and warm rivulets of water ran over my skin.I was meeting Will this morning and knew I had a couple of bridges to build with him over my deception around Alfie.
Driving into the parking lot on campus, I was feeling good about last night, then I saw Alfie talking to Will. They seemed deep in conversation, and I saw him pat Will’s back. Will was nodding, then he seemed to lean in, and I saw Alfie’s expression looked a little tense.
Will saw me, and his smile seemed a little forced.I wondered if they were talking about me. Alfie waved at me, then stopped Will by touching his arm and saying something to him.
Alfiecame toward me alone. Will sat back on a bench waiting for me. He hesitated, then leaned in and kissed me lightly on the cheek. It gave me goose bumps, but I tried to ignore them. “Hey. You were so peaceful last night I thought it best to leave yousleeping.”
Smiling warmly and giving me his full attention, he asked, “What time did you leave?”
I shrugged. “Late.” I was smiling but felt a little shy around him today. “I really enjoyed last night.”
Luscious lips curled into a beautiful smile, and my own smile widened, mirroring his. “Yeah, it was really nice. I liked it, thank you.” I echoed his sentiment.
Alfie looked pleased with my answer. “You want to hang with my band tonight? We’re playing in Orlando.”
I hadn’t heard his band play. “Can Will andSaffycome as well?” Alfie’s brows tightened, before his face relaxed. “Yeah, why not, we’re going down in a minivan. It’ll be a late night though.”
We agreed to arrange times later, and I turned to see Will begin to stand and walk toward me. “I’ll catch you later, Alfie. Will’s a little neglected this morning by the looks of things.”
Walking over to Will, I could see he didn’t look good at all. “What’s going on with you?” Will hugged himself then gestured a shrug. I rubbed his shoulder. “That bad, huh?”
Something was badly wrong with Will—he was almost in tears and I hugged him tightly. “I don’t think you’re ready to say what you are thinking, Will.”
He nodded. “Yeah, Lily, you get me, don’t you?”
Guiding us into the canteen, I wandered over to the counter, coming back with two large lattes and some donuts.“Love sickness antidepressants,” I commented, smiling. I was trying to lift his mood. Will couldn’t really raise a smile but appeared to appreciate my efforts.
