Page 72 of Guys Can't Write Romance
“Oh, gawd,” Daisy said, banging her head back on the table. “I blame it on sleep deprivation and heat stroke from being out in the sun all afternoon.”
“You need to face reality, Daze. Chad McKenzie is squatting in your subconscious rent-free, and he’s redecorating.”
“Who’s squatting where?” came Ava’s voice.
They both looked up to find Ava approaching their table in her designer suit, looking like she’d just stepped out of a law firm catalog. Even her coffee cup seemed more sophisticated than theirs.
“Perfect timing!” Chloe beamed. “We were just discussing how Daisy made Coach Chad the romantic hero in her novel.”
“I did not!” Daisy protested, sitting up straight.
“She totally did. Want to read it? It’s like a romance novel and a diary had a baby.”
“Don’t you dare,” Daisy reached for the manuscript, but Chloe pulled it out of reach.
“Let’s see.” Chloe flipped through several pages, her eyes scanning for particularly damning evidence. “Here we go. ‘Rick ran a hand through his perpetually messy hair, and Julie fought the urge to smooth it down. Everything about him was beautifully chaotic, from his mismatched socks to his terrible jokes, and she was terrified by how much she’d grown to love that chaos.’”
“Oh, goodness,” Ava sat down hard. “Tell me you didn’t.”
“It’s pure coincidence!” Daisy grabbed for the pages again, nearly knocking over her own coffee in the process. “Any resemblance to actual persons is completely unintended.”
“Oh, and look at this,” Chloe said, pointing to a line. “He literally just called her ‘Fields’ instead of Julie.”
“That was a typo!”
Chloe’s eyes skimmed down the page, her expression growing more delighted with each sentence. “Three times?”
“Four,” Ava noted, reading over Chloe’s shoulder. “And he called her ‘a cute, but neurotic control freak’?”
Chloe grinned, leaning back in her chair. “That is such a Chad thing to say.”
“I’m going to kill you both,” Daisy grumbled.
“No, you won’t,” Chloe grinned. “You love us. Almost as much as Rick loves Julie, and Chad loves...”
“Don’t say it!” Daisy snarled.
“This is concerning,” Ava frowned. “What about Ethan and your five-year plan? I needn’t remind you he’s on the fast track to becoming a partner at his firm.”
“You keep ‘needn’t reminding’ us every time we see you,” said Chloe.
“And I’m going to keep doing it until Daisy wakes up.”
“Girls!” Daisy cut in. “Can we please stop discussing my love life?”
“Sure,” Chloe picked up the manuscript again. “Let’s discuss Rick’s ‘impossibly blue eyes’ instead. Or how his ‘casual touch sends sparks through her whole body.’ Or my personal favorite, ‘his laugh makes her forget why she ever thought chaos was a bad thing.’”
Daisy groaned and banged her head on the table again.
“Face it,” Chloe patted her hair. “Your subconscious is Team Chad all the way. Even your fictional characters are tired of waiting for you to figure it out.”
“There are no teams,” Daisy mumbled into the table.
“Tell that to your novel.” Chloe shot Ava a triumphant smile. “Team Chad has officially taken the lead.”
“Daisy, honey,” Ava said, leaning forward. “You do realize this is a disaster.”
“Really? I hadn’t noticed,” Daisy muttered sarcastically, not lifting her head from its resting place on the table.
