Page 41 of Taming the Bear
The three other try to hide a smirk and look away from us. The fake blonde is trying to get them to rally against me. “I don’t give a fuck if you like me or if you don’t. But don’t think you can bash me and expect me to be okay with it.”
One of the redheads smirks and then tosses her hair to the side so she can look at me better. If she wasn’t mean mugging me, I would have told her that her red hair is beautiful. Actually, I would totally dye my hair that color next. I mentally file her hair color away in my head to bring that to Jen.
Jen works better with pictures, so I’m going to have to find a way to be creepy and take a picture of this chick.
“Look, Pink, you’re new here so I’m going to give you a head’s up on how things work,” she says. “Since you’re not claimed, your opinion doesn’t matter. You are beneath us. Understand? Untouchable.”
My head quirks to the side and I look at her overly made up hair and makeup and then it all made sense. “You totally want to fuck Joe!” I blurt out.
The other redhead smiles and I can’t help but look her up and down. She’s actually really pretty and has that innocent schoolgirl look to her. If the tables were turned a different way, I think that she would have been someone that I had something in common with. I don’t know, there’s something about her that makes me think that.
Now I remember where I saw her. She’s the girl that lost her pants that one day when I went to go see Big Sir… Britney or something.
Anyways, sorry for the rant, she nudges the other redhead and nods her head towards me. “Damn, the new girl has you down pack! Kate, you’re not that secretive with your feelings.”
Feeling a sense of accomplishment, I smile to myself and then start to turn around but the Slut stops me. “Oh, and, Pinky. The Bear’s only with you because he thinks he has to save you. He has some stupid fucking hero complex where he thinks he needs to save everyone that he comes across. You’re nothing but a replacement for his true love.”
My back straightens and I look at the ground. What the fuck did she just say to me? A hero complex? Yeah, Joe seems to want to save me but I wouldn’t consider it a hero complex. “What did you just say?”
The Slut walks up to me and gets really close to my face. “Yeah, his baby mama was my sister.”
Joe has a kid? Why didn’t he say anything to me?
I don’t know if it’s warranted, but I feel as if he has betrayed me by not telling me about this. We had sex but we didn’t have a honeymoon. Do I have the right to confront him about this? Is he keeping his kid quiet because he doesn’t want to piss me off or something?
The redhead that I was starting to like steps up to the Slut and puts her hand on her shoulder to pull her back from me. “Look, she doesn’t need to know about Dana and J.J. You’ve made your point and you just stirred up a hornet’s nest by telling her The Bear’s business. He’s going to be fucking pissed off.”
The Slut smiles as if she has something over me, which she does, and then winks at me. “Britney,” she addresses the redhead next to her. “Pinky needs to know that she’s nothing but a replacement and our boys are trying to save her bitch ass because she got in trouble.”
Britney looks away and then back at me as if she’s begging me to say something. I don’t know what else to say to her because she’s got me here. I don’t know what the fuck she’s talking about and now I’m beginning to wonder if anything about Joe is true.
“Val, seriously, you’ve got to keep your fucking mouth shut. I’m not going to be able to protect you when The Bear finds out that you are telling this new girl all about this.”
Val shakes her shoulders just a little and then sticks her nose in the air. As she walks past me, I think about how she looks stuck up. Her shoulder plows into mine when she walks past me. It hurt but I didn’t say anything.
Val, or The Slut, looks as if she’s got me all figured out. “See ya, Pinky!” She sings out as she strolls out of the kitchen.
Britney stands next to me and she places her hand on my shoulder. “Look, I don’t know what you’ve got going on with The Bear… Just be careful.”
I feel tears prick my eyeballs and I wince at the thought of showing emotions to any of these people. When I know that I’m alone in the kitchen, I dry my eyes and then walk back to the room to figure out what the fuck is happening.
All of our conversations that we’ve had the past couple of weeks play in my mind. Everything that he has said and everything that I’ve told him replays in my head. I told him all about Big Sir and how I owed him money, how I got into hacking… Everything.
He hasn’t told me shit. Nothing about his life outside the club or inside the club. I know that he’s the club president, but I don’t know anything abouthim,the man.
My chest hurts a little and I begin to panic over the thought of not seeing Joe again. What if when all of this is done, he’s done with me? Am I just a bed warmer or am I something more to him? My heart tightens a little as the thoughts of not meaning anything to him flood my brain.
After two weeks of knowing him, I’m appalled at myself for feeling so strongly. I can’t believe that I let myself entertain the idea of there being something real with him. I’m nothing but a chew toy.
Fuck. I’m as bad as The Slut. Well, she’s better than me there because she at least knows that is what her place is. I don’t know anything besides the fact that I’ve been hired to hack into his brothers’ computers and phones.
Can we have anything real or am I just another woman that opens my legs to the club president in hopes of something actual happening?
The Bear
Big Sir’s house is at the edge of the city and it takes about thirty minutes to get there. I’m in front of everyone and I stick my hand in the air to show them that we’re turning.
The roar of the Harleys is enough to make my skin goosebump. I love the sound of the powerful engines of the bikes and hearing them power through a quiet city. It’s like we are demanding all of the citizens to pay attention to us.
