Page 40 of Adore Me
"I always find it funny how you know where I have been, but you constantly ask. Savannah, stop being a dumb ass." He stroked my arm as I threw a plate on the table.
I hissed at him as I sat in front of him with a glass of Moscato. This was going to be a long night. "Don't touch me." The wine tingled as it slipped down my throat and into my stomach.
He took a bite of the chicken and glared at me. "You know something, I realized that I didn't love you anymore. Let's face it, we got married because you were pregnant and since you lost the baby, we have no reason to be married anymore." I always knew he could be hurtful, but he said it so nonchalantly that his words stabbed me.
I felt a thousand pounds being dropped on my chest. He is honestly telling me that he doesn't love me anymore. This is insane. I thought over the past couple of years and reflected on the fact that we haven't had sex in over a year and a half. We have started to live different lives away from each other and we don't spend a lot time together.
"Okay," I took a sip of the wine and looked down at my plate. Where will I go? Is he telling me that he wants a divorce? Oh shit, is this something that I did? My mind spun around and around about a dozen times before the feeling of hate and anger sunk in. "Are you saying you want a divorce?" I tried to sound carefree while asking him. There was no way I could let him see my emotions.
He hasn't said that he loved me in over a year. We haven't shared the same bed in that span of a year either. No one would probably even know that we were married. He spent most of his days with his friends and when he came home, he rarely spoke to me.
"Yes, I want a divorce. Why would I want to come home to you every night? You never dress up for me and we haven't had sex in forever. Get out of our place!" Joel reached over the table and knocked the plate on the ground. As he walked over to me, I grabbed my phone that was sitting on the table and called Anne.
Anne came to pick me up about ten minutes later. I was only able to grab a handful of my things since Joel was watching me like a hawk and demanded I left everything he gave me in the room. I only packed a small suitcase of some clothes and pictures of my family. While walking towards my jewelry box, Joel started yelling and I wasn't able to grab it.
When we left the apartment, I looked back at the door. This wasn't my home anymore. I wouldn't be coming back here. Joel didn't love me anymore. It is time to rebuild.
"If you don't want to do this, Vans, we can leave now," she rubbed my arm as I took a sip of my coffee.
Don't get me wrong, the coffee is good and everything, but I miss my chai. "I want to do this, but I am worried that Vincent won't want me anymore like Joel did."
Her eyes twitched and Anne jumped off the bed and walked out the door. As I tried to imagine where she was going, the door opened, and people walked in.
"Baby doll," Vincent walked into the room and I stood up to walk towards him. "What's wrong, my love? Is everything all right?" When he was close enough to me, I grabbed on to him and pulled him as close to me as I could.
"I am sorry, I am just scared. What if you don't want me anymore?" My tears formed and Anne walked out onto the balcony to give us privacy. Every one of my insecurities, doubts and inadequacies came bubbling to the surface.
He grabbed my cheeks and held them in his hands. I looked into his eyes that held pain and noticed that he looked sad. I am such a bad person. Only a bad person would constantly make this beautiful man look so defeated.
"I will always want you. If you don't want to do this, it’s okay. Don't worry about it. We can still do what we are doing," his thumbs rubbed the tears off my face. "I love you, Savannah, with all of my heart. I would love to marry you. You make my life a ton better and you make me so happy. For the first time in years, I feel alive and I feel alive because of you." His tone is so sincere, and his eye looked pleading.
Happy tears rolled down my cheeks. "I love you too. I am sorry," I rubbed my cheek on his chest and wrapped my hands into his shirt to keep him close to me. What a complete shocker, he is dressed in his usual attire.
"Is this something that you want?" Vincent ran his hand down my back and smoothed my hair.
"Yes, I am ready now. Thank you." I squeezed him tighter and he stroked the back of my head.
"Good, I am so happy. I have a surprise for you."
Almost as if it were planned, a feta cheese and ham omelet was at the door and so was Caridee.
Vincent has a big smile on his face as I took in the scene. "I knew you would want her here and she wanted to be here, as well," I lifted my face as he spoke. His eyes were smiling at me and I fell harder for him. "I will see you soon," he got really close to my ear and kissed my lobe. "I will love you with forever, don't forget that. It’s you and me."
Chapter 33
Caridee gave me some beach waves after re-highlighting my hair. My hair is blonder than normal due to the sun and now more bleach, but I love it anyways. She spun Anne's hair into a twist and gave her a natural makeup look.
I wasn't able to look at myself until everything was finished. This is so frustrating; I need to make sure that I look beautiful because I want tocherish these weddingmemories for as long as I live. Anne was in the bathroom getting our dresses out and my impatience is winning. I want my dress!
"Kitten, I am dying to see it! Please let me see it!" She still hasn't shown it to me.Bitch.
"Almost. The wedding starts in an hour and then you can see it soon."
"Shit. It’s already eight!" I looked at the clock by the bed which made Caridee grab my face to get me to stop moving. Vincent said that sunset would be the perfect time to pledge our lives together and I think he is right.
Caridee growled at me and her fingertips gripped my cheeks. "Seriously, you don't want raccoon eyes on your wedding day! They will look horrible for your pictures!"
"Wait, I don't have a photographer. Anne! How could we forget that?"
