Page 45 of Dirty Little Secret
There was a moment of silence. “How’d you get her number?” Kane asked.
“Off your phone,” he answered. “I’ve gotta go, Mom. Goodnight. I hope you have nice dreams.”
No one had ever wished for me to have nice dreams. It felt so insanely great that I thought I must be kind of weirdo to feel such elation over these simple words of kindness from the son I thought I’d lost a long time ago. “Goodnight, Fox. I hope you do too.”
“I love you,” he said quickly, like he was blurting it out before he lost his nerve. As I caught my breath, feeling my heart swell again, he asked tentatively, “Is that okay?”
I didn’t know what to say. The truth was that no one had ever spoken those words to me before. And here it was, my son once again being the first person to say such a thing to me. “Fox, of course that is okay. It’s more than okay. I love you too.” The words slipped right off my tongue, as if I’d said them thousands of times.
“I love you too, Mom. Goodnight.” And then he hung up the phone.
I sat there, still cradling the phone in my hand, not ready to fully let go of the connection to my son. I finally put it down and closed my eyes. Everything was changing, and so quickly.
A part of me had a nagging notion that this would all end badly, as most things in my life had. The biggest part of me hoped like hell that this wouldn’t end at all. I hoped this would grow and take my entire life in a whole new direction.
Only a short while later, my cell rang again. This time Kane’s name came up on the screen. My heart raced as I looked at it. “Hi there,” I answered.
“Hi. How’re you doing?” he asked. I could hear clinking in the background, like ice cubes in a glass.
“Very good.” I didn’t want to admit to him that Fox had just said so many important things to me that I’d never heard from anyone else before. But that seemed rather pathetic to me.
A twenty-six-year-old woman who’d never been told those three little words,I love you,seemed like a tragedy. I didn’t want Kane to see me as a tragedy.
“So, Fox tells me that you two will have your first ritual, the goodnight call.” He chuckled. “I think that’s nice. But how’re you going to make that call when you’re working nights at the bar, Zandra?”
I knew he was just protecting his son and making sure I didn’t make any promises that I couldn’t keep. “You’re a great father, Kane Price. I had no idea, back then, that you were capable of being such a great dad.” I paused for minute, not knowing if I should go on. But I couldn’t keep all these thoughts to myself anymore. “If I’d realized that all those years ago, I might’ve just run away from my parents and gone straight to you.”
He got really quiet then finally said, “Let’s not talk about the past, Zandra. It’s not like we can change any of it. And thank you for the compliment.”
He was right. Why dwell on something neither of us could change? “You’re welcome. So, I bet you’ve got a boatload of questions for me. You may as well start asking.”
“Honestly, I do have some questions for you. Fox filled me in on your driving record, so I’ve got that one answered.” He laughed again and I heard him taking a drink of something before he went on. “How about this one—have you missed me?”
My body froze, going completely stiff. My fingers gripped the phone and I couldn’t think of what the hell to say to him.
Have I missed him?
He and I hadn’t had enough time together to make any kind of a real connection, or so I’d told myself over the years. But I had thought of him a lot. Was that the same thing as missing him?
“Kane, you and I didn’t know each other well enough for me to say that I missed you. I did think of you often, though.” I thought about letting him in on the truth, and after a brief moment of hesitation, decided to go for it. “And I have to admit this to you. Even though you were my first sexual experience, you were also by far that best.”
He let out a sigh. “You were mine too, Zandra.”
I couldn’t believe him. “No way. I don’t want you saying anything just to get into my panties again, Kane.”
“I’m not just saying it.” His voice dropped an octave, sounding even sultrier than his normal tone. “You and I connected more that night than I’ve ever connected with anyone. I don’t know what that says about me, but I know it’s the truth.”
If it was confession time, I decided I may as well lay it all on the line. “Kane, I did feel something special when I was with you. And I’ve compared you to every man I’ve ever had sex with, and you’ve won every single time. I’ve never connected with anyone either, other than that brief time with you. I guess that says something about us. Don’t you think so?”
“I do.” He took another drink and exhaled slowly. “But we’ve got to take things slow. Very slow.”
He had no idea how badly I wanted to not take things slow. I wanted to dive right into life with him and Fox and never come out. But I understood him. “Being the excellent parent that you are, I will go along with you on this.”
“Good. Follow my lead, Zandra, and I’m sure things will work out.” His sexy laugh sent chills through me. “That said, I’m talking about being in Fox’s life. When it comes to my life, to my bed, those rules don’t apply. Tell me what you’re wearing, baby.”
“Kane!” I guess I should’ve expected it, considering the way he’d come onto me in his office, but I couldn’t help my squeak of surprise at his one-eighty. “You’re so bad.” I laughed seductively, unable to help myself. He’d turned me into a hot mess—and in record time, too.
“I am. And I want to be bad with you. I’ve missed you, baby. I’ve missed the way your body feels when its pinned underneath mine. I’ve missed the way your tight pussy clenched around my cock. How your lips tasted and your tongue moved. How your tits felt when they were squished against my chest.”
