Page 83 of A Trial of the Heart
Rashad nodded, hoisted me from my feet, and cradled me in his arms. I was in pain, and the babies were coming, but the way Rashad pushed his way out of the courtroom, you would have thought he’d seen one of the babies’ heads crowning under my skirt.
Getting the picture as we passed them, my mother, LeeAnn, and Isla filed out behind us. It was baby time.
“Seven, eight, nine, ten!”
“Push, Shiloh. Push. You got this.”
“Come on, Shiloh. Don’t give up. Keep going. Keep going. Yes!”
I heard the many encouraging words as I pushed with all I could. Rashad stood on one side of me helping me hold my leg up, while my mother stood on the other holding that leg up.LeeAnn was at my feet prepared to welcome my twins into the world. I’d come into the hospital a few hours ago with a broken water and five centimeters dilated. I’d progressed fast, reaching ten centimeters in less than two hours. The babies were ready but not coming as I’d been pushing for an eternity and not one baby had made their entrance. I was tired and exhausted, and I was starting to think all theI got this,andthe babies were almost herewas a hoax. Hearing ten and the contraction subsiding, I breathlessly dropped back on the bed, attempting to regain my strength and regulate my breathing.
“I can’t do this.” Tears ran down my face, settling in my ear. “Just give me the epidural,” I cried.
“Shiloh, you know that’s not an option now,” one of the nurses spoke softly as she stroked the top of my head.
“Then wheel me to the fucking operating room and give me a C-section,” I cried. I didn’t want to be rude and curse, but the pain I was dealing with had me not acting like myself.
“Shiloh we cannot do that; you’re already ten centimeters. You’re going to push these babies out, and that is that,” LeeAnn stated with authority. “Now, on this next contraction, shut up, bear down, and get this first baby out.” She spoke like my true friend and not my doctor.
“I can’t.” The tears wouldn’t stop, and snot dripped from my nose.
“Shiloh, don’t give up, baby girl.” My mother rubbed my leg.
“It hurts so bad.” I wanted to be strong as everyone kept proclaiming I was, but I just couldn’t find the strength.
“Baby?” Rashad spoke, getting my attention.
“There is no giving up. You got this. I know this is a pain you don’t want, but the faster you push out our children, the sooner it’llall be over.” He spoke softly.
Everyone else had encouraged me, but when Rashad spoke, and I stared into his eyes, I believed him most. I could do this. I couldn’t give up no matter how intense the pain was.
“Next contraction is coming, you ready?” LeeAnn asked.
I looked away from Rashad to her for a brief second. Her expression was stone, but her eyes were soft and compassionate. I looked back to Rashad and found that peace I always saw. I nodded, though he spoke no words.
“Let’s go, Shiloh,” LeAnn said.
Pulling in a deep breath, I dropped my chin to my chest, placed my hand behind my thighs, closed my eyes, and pushed. I knew I wasn’t alone in the room, but as I pushed with the little strength I had, I tuned them out and gave it all I had. My vagina felt like it was splitting down the middle, and it burned like LeeAnn had set a match to it.
“Go, go, go.”
“Shiloh, you’re doing it.”
“Oh my gosh! Look at that hair.”
The many voices filled my head, but I still didn’t give them any attention.
“Oh my gosh!” I screamed, feeling the pressure and my vagina actually split seconds before I heard the loud ear-piercing cry of a baby.
“It’s a girl!” I heard someone say, but I couldn’t react as another contraction was tearing through my body, and I felt the urgency to push.
“I gotta push.” I was already getting into position.
“Let’s go then,” LeeAnn said.
I closed my eyes, preparing to push again.I thought the first baby took me out, but I was damn sure mistaken as the last baby was giving me a run for my money. I was pushing until the nurse got to ten, but even then, I didn’t give up. I wanted this baby out and the pain to seize. Feeling pressure and then an instant stateof relief, I relaxed my body back on the bed, heaving heavily. The second baby’s cries were heard but nowhere near as long as their older sibling.
“It’s a boy!” LeeAnn announced with a shaky voice.
