Page 104 of Safety Net
"Well?" I asked Ellis, who had also gotten off the stage, to join my side as we took in our work. He'd slept for only an hour before getting up and getting to work. Since Ellis wasn'tmotivated to make the woman he was in love with happy, he moved at a slower pace than I did. Despite that, I appreciated the company.
"Does it look okay?" I examined our handiwork. Despite this being a rush job, I'd done everything possible to make sure the details were correct. The paint job had been meticulous, resulting in clean lines and no smudges. I'd rigged up the backdrop so the crew backstage could easily change it with a tug of the rope. It took a good half hour to retrieve decor from storage and figure out how to arrange the flowers, bushes, and wicker baskets in a non-distracting way.
"Do you think she'll like it?" I asked, reconsidering my arrangement, wondering if the banister needed a fourth coat of paint. I debated whether I'd given enough attention to the balcony positioning because if it were a little more to the left, the lights above would hit the actors more easily.
"She's going to love it." Ellis nudged my arm when he noticed my brow was tense. "You did an incredible job. It looks way better than I thought it'd be."
"Really? No notes? Don't hold back. I need this to be perfect for her." I crossed my arms over my chest, trying to quiet my critical thoughts. I'd reached the point of fatigue where opening my eyes from blinking felt like pulling a boulder from the bottom of the ocean.
"Lincoln, it's perfect," he assured. "You've been up for over twelve hours. Even if there was something to fix, I don't think your brain would be capable of doing it well. You need to get back home and get some rest."
"What about the bench on that side?" I pointed. "Don't you think it'll look better in the middle?"
"Lincoln," he said, serious. "Have you been diagnosed with ADHD?"
I blinked (it takes my last bit of willpower not to knock out while standing). "What?"
"You've never mentioned it, so I thought maybe you hadn't. And then, I wondered if maybe you didn't even recognize your symptoms."
"I'm…no, I haven't gotten tested." It'd been something my teachers considered when I was in elementary school. But somewhere along the way, my grandma brushed off testing and instead decided TV and the internet were the problem. And books were the solution. I stayed still long enough when I got caught up in theHardy Boysseries, thus satisfying the adults around me.
"You should consider it," Ellis said. "Meds help me a ton."
"I'll add it to my growing list of concerns," I promised, tucking the information in the back of my mind to revisit when I wasn't challenging the earth to a race around the sun.
"Good. But for now—" Ellis grabbed my shoulder and gave it a tight squeeze. “—sleep. You need it. We could nitpick right into next week; it doesn't matter at this point."
"This just...it all has to be perfect for her," I said. "If I ruined this?—"
"Celeste is the most forgiving person I know."
"I know, and that's exactly why I don't want even to ask that of her." One night of hard work wasn't going to change me fundamentally. I had to do better consistently, and I would keep doing so. In the meantime, I wasn't expecting forgiveness. But a small, selfish part of me hoped she'd be willing to give me a chance. That she’d be willing to wait for me while I removed my roadblocks and untangled my hang-ups.
"You won't have to ask," Ellis said.
I smiled. "Thanks for being here."
"It's my mom's set and my cousin's dream," he said. "I'm biologically obligated to be here."
I chuckled. "That doesn't make any sense."
"Sorry, I'm not as alert as you after this long," he said. "You must be incredible during finals week."
"It's typically my best week," I confirmed.
"Let's go home." Ellis's shoulders relaxed, relieved he was finally able to step away.
I shook my head, mind still racing and stomach twisting at the thought of forgetting something. There would be no stone unturned, especially this close to the finish line. The joy of finishing the set was temporary, overshadowed by one final task. "Not yet."
"Lincoln." He groaned. "The bench is fine where it is. Everything's fine where it is."
I laughed. "No, I know. I just have to pick up some flowers. That's tradition, right? Opening night flowers?"
"Celeste will understand if you forgo tradition."
"I want her to have it all. She's going to have it all."
"Fine." He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "And then, sleep?"
