Page 55 of Unmasked By a Captivating Lady
Tears stung behind her eyes, and she rolled over in the bed. She felt so low, she just didn’t know what to do anymore. She simply had to make up her mind about him. Did she hate him, or did she love him? Did she want him to stay as far away from her as was possible, or did she want him to kiss her, and touch her, and tell her that he loved her?
She gritted her teeth in frustration. If onlysomeonewould tell her what to do. If only there was someone she could speak to, in confidence, who might offer her wise words, and help her make up her mind. She strained her mind, but she knew that there was no one she could possibly ask.
Everyone would be simply horrified that she had let the man take the liberties that he already had. They would surely tell her that she was doomed to burn in hell.
She gazed out of the window, feeling the tears fall down her face. She was all alone with this, just like she had always been. No one could help her.
She got up slowly, padding to the window, pulling the curtains back. It was indeed a beautiful day, even more glorious than yesterday, if that was possible. Suddenly, the constraints of the house, and her agonised indecision about Miles, was all too much for her.
She simply had to get out… or die.
***
Ara fidgeted in the seat in front of the dressing table as Mary, her maid, did her hair. For some reason, it seemed to be taking a lot longer this morning, than it usually did.
“My, you are restless,” said the maid, smiling gently. “You are like a fly against a window, miss! Buzzing around, bashing against the glass…what is the hurry? Is there anything special planned for today?”
Ara slowly shook her head. “I am sorry, Mary. I just feel…restless.”
Mary eyed her in the mirror. “It wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain handsome lord, would it, miss? One who romantically shot a highwayman, before being injured himself?”
Ara blushed, to the roots of her hair. “Oh, Mary,” she said. “Do you think himveryhandsome?”
Mary stared at her as if she had suddenly sprouted another head. “Miss, he is one of the handsomest men that I have ever seen!” She shuddered slightly. “Those dark eyes, and those large hands! I know a lot of women who wouldn’t say no to him, that is for sure!”
Ara’s blush deepened. “When you say that…do you mean tolyingwith him?” She held her breath. Mary would probably look shocked that she had even mentioned such a thing.
But the maid smiled slowly. “Oh, miss, you are a young lady, and ignorant about what goes on between a man and a woman.” She hesitated. “But it is lovely, if you are with the right man, and open yourself to him. It is not the chore which you have been brought up to believe.” She looked suddenly alarmed, clapping a hand over her mouth. “I am sorry, miss, if I have spoken out of turn…”
Ara shook her head, gripping the maid’s hand on her shoulder. “Do not say sorry, Mary,” she whispered fiercely. “Never say sorry for speaking the truth. I am glad that you have told me what you really believe.”
The maid ducked her head shyly, looking surprised. “Well, thank you, miss. But I am not sure your lady mother would approve…”
Ara stared at the maid in the mirror. “My lady mother does not have to know, does she?”
Mary smiled slowly. “No, indeed, miss. My lips are sealed.”
***
Ara thought about Mary’s words as she stole out of the house, her heart beating frantically. About how it could be lovely between a man and a woman…if it was therightman.
Quickly, she headed towards the stables. She knew that everyone else would be at the breakfast table by now, but she would only take five minutes. All she wanted to do was feel the sun on her face, breathe the fresh air, and speak to Pem. She felt like it was the only thing that would soothe her troubled soul at the moment.
There was no one around the stables as she approached. Quickly, she slipped in, heading towards the stall at the back where she knew that her beloved horse was kept.
She saw his chestnut coat, gleaming in a beam of sunlight, which fell across the stable. He whinnied, long and deep, when he saw her. Her heart lifted immediately.
“Pem,” she said slowly, approaching him. “It is sogoodto see you, boy.”
She stroked him gently. It seemed like months, if not years, since she had been alone with him. Guiltily, she knew that some of it was her own fault. Her father had brought him to London, but she had been so distracted with the Duke…
She stiffened. ThefalseDuke, she corrected herself. The man had tricked her for his own selfish purposes. She must never forget that.
Her sudden happiness at being near her horse burst like a bubble at the thought of him. Restlessly, she stared around the stable. There was only so long that she could stay here, before she had to go back inside. Before she had to be imprisoned within those walls again.
Withhim.
Suddenly, she simply couldn’t bear the thought of it.
