Page 64 of Treating a Sinful Earl
“I have terrible news.”
This brought a horrid expression to Selina’s face. “What has happened?”
Despite herself, Catherine flung herself onto her bed and brought her face to her hands. “I discovered a note,” she shared. “I note that I fear to speak of, but I must.”
Selina came over and seated herself on the bed. “Tell me all.”
Now, the tears could finally fall. “Jasper has six months to live. There was a note…from the doctor…explaining the truth.” She tried to speak through her sobs.
“Oh, Catherine, this is what I feared.”
“What did you fear?” she asked, hoping that Selina might be telling her the truth.
“That he was…using you in some way.”
It was bitter medicine to swallow. Although she had been hesitant to accept Selina’s advice, Catherine truly needed it now. “Do you think that he is using me?”
She cocked her head to the side and frowned. “Naturally, he is. Oh, Catherine. You have been blind all this while. Can you not see that he knew of this all along, and he has been trying to live out the rest of his days…in pleasure? This is the reputation that I spoke of before. Oh, men are so trying. I feel bad for you, my dear, sweet friend.”
Everything within Catherine’s being was collapsing. How could she have been so stupid? How could she have been so deceived? Although it was hard to accept Selina’s words, she had to admit to herself that her friend made a sound point. Catherine had been blind, and also, she had perhaps been foolish because love had coloured her vision. This was the reminder that she needed all along. She had not been able to see the truth.
“But…I truly believed that we were in love.”
Selina sighed. “That is how love works, Catherine. It is all blindness. I see things so clearly from the outside, but I halt myself when it comes to expressing what I see. From the very start, he has used you. I am so sorry, my dear friend.” Selina brought a hand to Catherine’s back as the sobs continued.
Could anything be more distressing? Could anything be more mortifying? For Catherine, this was the epitome of pain and suffering, for the man that she had loved most in this world had deceived her.
But had he?
It was all too confusing to understand. But for now, she allowed the tears to fall and the anguish to penetrate her whole body.
Chapter 30
Jasper managed to carry the tea tray effortlessly to the study. When he opened the door…Catherine was not there. This was not alarming at first. He had been gone a trifle long and wondered if she was in search of him. Setting the tea tray down, he called out her name, and receiving no reply, he exited the study and began to examine his manor. Everything was quiet, except for the occasional footfall of servants.
It was in the parlour that Jasper froze, a wave of fear taking hold. He looked at the sofa where he and Catherine had shared some of their most intimate moments. This made his heart break even more. Had she fled? Then, a sinking suspicion took hold, and Jasper ran to the study. He went directly to his desk, and there, unfolded, was the horrible news that the doctor had shared.
Jasper picked up the paper in his hand and instantly crushed it, throwing it into a waste bin and placing his hands on his hips, downcast all the while in frustration. Yes, the letter was what drove Catherine away. Why ever was he so stupid as to have left it there? He combed his hand through his hair as he tried to think. What the devil should he do next? He could write her a letter to be sent immediately, he could simply wait till the next day, or he could find her this very minute.
Rushing to the front door, Jasper chose the latter, exiting into the roundabout and considering whether to travel to her on foot. This would take far too much time, so Jasper ran to the stables, where the stableboy had already retired for the day. There was no time to place a saddle on his horse, and so he merely took the animal from its stall and hopped right on, giving little care to the fact that he was still wearing his fine suit for supper.
As he raced along, Jasper felt sick, and tears threatened to come to the surface. What was to be a sumptuous night alone with Catherine had turned into an utter disaster. Why had he summoned the doctor as Felton told him to do? If he had not done so, this mess would never have happened. There was no need to know the truth, for the truth was too grim. He could have married Catherine and experienced bliss for the next six months of his life…the last six months of his life.
All of these thoughts and so many more plagued his mind as he rode along through the cool night air, the light from the moon beaming down upon him. It was not long before he reached Catherine’s abode. He knew which window was hers, and as he jumped off of his horse, he saw her back turned towards him. Jasper wanted nothing more in the world than to call out to her. But from where he stood, he could tell that Catherine was in tears.
Should he knock at the door and demand an audience? For surely, the pressing need to speak with her was so overwhelming that Jasper could not hold himself back. He rushed to the door, knocked upon it, and a footman appeared.
“I must speak with Lady Trowbridge.”
His eyes went wide with shock. “At this hour?” the footman asked.
“Yes, at this very hour.”
“One moment. You may wait in the parlour.”
Jasper was escorted to the parlour and did not have the patience to sit, so he paced about. Before the footman exited the room, he turned and said, “I beg your pardon. I did not ask for your name.”
“The Earl of Simmons,” Jasper replied anxiously.
