Page 39 of Tutoring a Lady into Sin
“Well…in just five days, you are set to be married to the most attractive duke in all the land, and yet, you are dallying with his younger brother. It is the stuff scandals are made of.” Miss Fitzroy had been giggling, but then she calmed almost at once. “Oh no, my lady.”
“What?” Christianna urged.
“When I laughed, I was only thinking of the circumstances which might arise when a rake like the Duke of Bixby learned that you, his betrothed, were spending time with another man. He might even be accepting of it as your wayward behaviour would almost negate his own. But now, it occurs to me that he will not take well to the snub at all.”
Christianna heaved a perplexed sigh. “The thing is, Miss Fitzroy, I am not sure that I care what Percival thinks.”
“My lady?” Miss Fitzroy whispered in a shocked tone.
“Of course, I have no wish to embarrass the duke, but this morning, I find that my mind is consumed with thoughts of Doctor Radcliff. I liked kissing him, but what is more, I did not wish for him to stop.” She lowered her chin and stared at her hands which were folded delicately in her lap.
“I asked him to desist. But that was only because I was worried someone might catch us…not because I did not wish to give myself to him…completely.” She gulped, then lifted her chin so she might look at Miss Fitzroy once more. “Do you think me horrible for having such feelings?”
Miss Fitzroy shook her head. “I cannot say for certain, but I think your feelings were natural. You care for Lord Phineas deeply, and that is what is currently foremost in your mind. But, if I may, I would like to caution you, my lady.”
“Yes?” Christianna prompted. “Go on.”
“As I said before, if your affair with Lord Phineas should come to light, it might not make a difference to the duke,orhe could be greatly offended. He could cancel the wedding and—”
“But would that be so very bad?” Christianna interrupted. “If I were to decide I did not wish to marry Percival, but rather spend my days with Phineas, would that be…?”
“It would be the height of scandal,” Miss Fitzroy retorted. “Lord Phineas is the second son of the late Duke of Bixby. He may have a successful practice in London, but should you choose him over his brother, everyone will know what brewed between the two of you. He might lose some of his more fashionable patients, and that is only how his business will be impacted. That says nothing for the effect such a revelation will have on the family.”
“You think it would be awful?” Christianna whispered.
“I think it would be catastrophic. Women do not choose to wed the second son over the first…especially just a few days before the wedding. Not only will you endanger Lord Phineas’ reputation and your own, but you will put the family in an awkward position as well. For how is His Grace to accept such a rejection? Is he to make merry and pretend there was no slight at all?”
“So, I am doomed,” Christianna groaned. “I must marry one man but am in love with another.”
Miss Fitzroy pursed her lips for a moment, then said quietly, “I am not sure the situation is so dire, my lady. You only said you kissed Lord Phineas the other night. A lady may kiss whomever she likes, so long as she does it discreetly.
And if you look upon the time you spent with his lordship as just a bit of folly, a little frolicking you did before you settled down and married the duke, no one would think much of such trifles. But if youloveLord Phineas…well… do you think you truly love him, my lady?”
Christianna shook her head. “I do not know, Miss Fitzroy. I simply do not know.”
Chapter 16
Phineas stalked about his room feeling entirely unsettled and nowhere near ready to fall asleep. It was late, and even so, he could not calm his raging blood.
I must go and speak to her.
Dinner had been a disaster. Phineas had been sat far down the table from Christianna, and while he had stared at her all evening long, she had not so much as exchanged one courteous glance with him.
I offended her last night. I should not have kissed her. I should have…
But that was the trouble. Even though Phineas knew there was every possibility he had done something wrong, kissing Christianna had not felt like a crime. On the contrary, calling up the recollection made his heart soar. Every moment their lips were pressed together had been the most spectacular of his existence, and that made apologising for what passed between them nearly impossible. But he was determined to do it.
If she needs to hear me say I am sorry, then that is what I must do.
He had lingered in the parlour long after others had retired for the evening, hoping he might catch a moment with Christianna in private. But that was not to be. She had gone upstairs surrounded by a gaggle of women, including Lady Bianca and Phineas’ mother.
I should hate to think what Mama would say if she overheard such a capitulation. She would think I have gone mad, seducing my brother’s betrothed and doing it so close to the wedding date.
Phineas continued pacing his room, trying to discern what to do next, when there was a soft knock on the door. At first, he was not sure it was anything other than his imagination playing tricks on him. He stopped walking and faced the door.
Knock! Knock!
He moved to the door and held perfectly still for a moment.
