Page 75 of An Earl's Christmas Seduction
It was selfish to say such a thing, but it was true. He had feared the thought of living with his guilt, of losing her before he could tell her the truth as to what had happened. But now, they had been given a second chance, and Nicholas had no intention of wasting it, or failing to do what he should have done before.
In the short time they had known one another, his feelings for Amelia had grown stronger by the moment. He had fallen in love with her and knowing how close he had come to losing her had only made him fall more in love with her than before.
“It doesn’t matter now. We know the truth, though I must say, it’s more remarkable than I could ever have imagined it to be,” she replied.
Nicholas laughed. He felt the same. He had still not entirely taken in the fact that Edmund was his brother. The revelation of what his father had done and who he had loved was unexpected.
“I feel the same. More so, I suppose. My father kept so much hidden from me. I don’t know how to feel. Should I hate him? Should I try to understand what he did?” Nicholas asked.
He felt confused, hardly knowing what to think of his father, let alone everything else he had learned. But again, Amelia squeezed his hand.
“How do you want to feel? Do you want to be angry with him?” she asked, and Nicholas sighed.
He did not want to live his life in anger and bitterness. He did not blame his aunt, or Amelia’s mother, or Lady Thornton for keeping the matter a secret. His father had placed them each in an impossible situation, and it was only because of loyalty to others the secret had been kept.
“I don’t want to be, no. It’s in the past, I suppose. Though it presents us with a very different present. I should let you rest, Amelia. Your mother was most insistent on that,” he said, and Amelia smiled.
“Talk to Edmund,” she said, and Nicholas nodded.
“I will, but before I go, I’d like to kiss you,” he said, and she smiled.
Leaning forward, he kissed her gently on the lips, a lingering gesture of his love, their hands still clasped together.
“Thank you for what you did; for rescuing me,” she said, and Nicholas blushed.
“I just followed your tracks in the snow, that’s all,” he said. Just as the door opened, Amelia’s mother entered the room.
“I’ll stay with her now,” she said, and Nicholas nodded.
“Very well. I’ll come back later, I promise,” and with that, he left the room.
Pausing on the landing, Nicholas sighed, running his hands through his hair, hardly daring to believe what he now knew to be true. It was extraordinary, though he was glad to finally know the truth, as hard as it had been to hear. Now, he made his way downstairs, intending to speak to his brother.
***
Amelia’s mother stroked back her hair, leaning forward and kissing Amelia on the forehead.
“You need to rest now, Amelia. Are you warm enough? Can you feel your fingers? Your toes?” she asked, and Amelia nodded.
“I’m warm enough, Mother, yes,” she said, and her mother took her by the hand.
“Why did you run away, Amelia? I was so worried about you. Anything could’ve happened. You might’ve…well, it doesn’t matter now, but…I’m so glad you’re safe,” she said.
“I ran away because I thought Nicholas really was in love with Constance. I thought they’d both played me for a fool. I know it was a foolish thing to do. But I was so upset. I didn’t know what else to do. You wouldn’t listen, and you wouldn’t tell me what your secret was,” Amelia said.
She had been angry with her mother, even as she now realized the truth had been kept hidden for a reason.
“I couldn’t, Amelia. It was right to do so. We all of us agreed. I knew something was going to happen when we received the invitation to come here for Christmas. It was against my better judgment. But I wanted to get you away from London, and I didn’t know everyone else would be here, too. Your poor Godmother. They were so in love. But it had to be kept a secret,” she said.
Amelia sighed. There had been too many secrets, and her own and Nicholas’ was just one. She wanted to tell her mother everything, but still she was uncertain what would become of her own feelings for the earl. Was this to be only a Christmas romance, or would Nicholas be true to his word? So much had happened, so much had been revealed, and it would take some time to come to terms with it. Especially for Nicholas.
“And that’s what you promised?” Amelia replied.
Her mother nodded.
“That’s what we promised. I remember the day the news of her death arrived. I wept for hours, clinging to you, thankful I had my daughter. Poor Caroline never had that. She gave birth to two sons, and neither knew her, and she could not acknowledge them as her own. The old earl, Nicholas’ father loved her. But his hands were tied. It would’ve meant his ruin, and the ruin of Caroline’s father, too,” she said.
“I hope Nicholas can forgive his father. It wouldn’t do to carry a bitter memory. But where did they bury Caroline?” Amelia asked, even as she thought she knew the answer already.
