Page 44 of A Duke's Sinful Bargain
“My mother brought me here a few times as a child,” he told her, reminiscing. “She loved nature and, of course, picnics. She would always bring some sandwiches, lemonade, and a book.”
“Is that where your love of books commenced?” she wondered, turning to him every once in a while, her eyes hiding beneath those long eyelashes, hiding secrets he yearned to unearth.
He paused for a moment, grinning. “I almost went in the wrong direction there.”
“Wrong direction?” she asked, smiling.
“Yes.” He nodded. “At that time, a boy was interested in anything other than books. I wanted to run, to jump in that brook over there and see if it had any fish. I wanted to catch grasshoppers and frogs, while my mother bid me to stay still and listen.”
“Oh, what torture!” Anna teased him playfully.
“I’ll have you know that it was no fun,” he replied in mock indignation. “But then again, I suppose a lady such as yourself has never known the pleasure of holding a frog in her bare hands.”
“No, not really.” Anna chuckled in amusement.
His eyes lit up with a mischievous idea. “You know, it is never too late for that.” He glanced in the direction of the brook.
“Goodness, no!” Anna quickly shook her head, her melodious laughter spilling all around them.
“Are you certain?” he asked, still with that mischievous glint in his eyes.
“Absolutely certain, thank you,” she assured him.
“Your loss, my lady,” he continued to tease.
“I think I can live with that.” She was still smiling, her entire face lit up by the joy she was emanating. “In fact, it is strange what one can learn to live with…” She added this part more to herself, and when she noticed that he was looking at her, she quickly clarified. “I’m sorry. I… I didn’t mean to ruin such a lovely time…”
“No, no,” he urged. “You can talk to me about anything, Anna. You know that.”
She hesitated for a moment, then she continued as her voice trembled with vulnerability. “When my father ordered me to marry Lord Ravenscroft, I thought my life was over. In my naivety, I had hoped I would marry for love, that my husband would be my everything, that I would be as precious to him as a drop of water in the desert. But I was young, and I didn’t know how the world functioned. I knew no love or passion for this man… I shouldn’t speak ill of the dead.”
“It is not ill if it is the truth,” he reminded her gently.
Her eyes lifted toward his, expressing gratitude. “He was a cold man. Mine is a past colored by duty and obligation, rather than happiness and love. My younger self used to think that that kind of life was akin to death. But I ended up surprising myself. I kept on living. And I am still alive, despite everything.”
Her words hung in the air between them, heavy with the weight of years of unspoken longing and unfulfilled desires. He could read her mind as clearly as he could read his own.
“You are brave beyond words, Anna,” Alexander murmured, his voice laden with tenderness. “This is a weight many carry, but none as gracefully as you.”
She smiled weakly. “Everyone carries their own weight as best as they can, Alexander. As for me, I was young and naïve. I knew nothing of the world beyond the confines of my father’s expectations. But now I do. And this knowledge is liberating. You see, fear keeps you a prisoner, and I’ve been one for far too long.”
“Yes, you no longer have a husband who controls you.” Alexander nodded, absolutely certain that if he were ever to marry her, he would never keep her his prisoner. On the contrary, he would help her flourish and blossom, he would protect her vulnerabilities and make her even stronger.
“He didn’t know any better,” she explained, highlighting her ability to only see the best in everyone. “He didn’t see any of it as controlling. He was… a different sort of man. A man like my father. A man who belonged to a different time, or perhaps, it is me who belongs to a different time.”
“No.” Alexander reached out to gently brush away a stray tear from Anna’s cheek. “You are timeless, Anna. You belong to no times and all times. That is why you are so misunderstood…”
Their eyes locked, and at that moment, he felt a profound sense of connection with her, a connection not born out of physical desire, but of shared vulnerability and understanding that transcended the boundaries of their arrangement.
“It takes great courage to speak one’s deepest truth,” he murmured softly, his voice filled with admiration and awe of this woman who had bared her soul to him. “And in doing so, you have shown me a glimpse of the beautiful, resilient woman that lies beneath the surface of what you project to the world.”
Without thinking, she took him by the hand. He squeezed hers back. This moment was more innocent, more tender than he could have imagined it. He could see in her eyes that she found solace in his words, and it soothed him.
Suddenly, Anna looked to the side, and the corner of her lip danced in a smile. He turned in the same direction, wondering what had amused her so.
“It seems Eliza is really interested in learning how to fish,” Anna said playfully, unable to resist chuckling as she did so.
Alexander could see Tom and Eliza engaged in a tender moment by the brook. Tom’s usual, patient guidance was met by Eliza’s eager enthusiasm, their connection palpable even from afar. Alexander wondered how come he did not understand it immediately upon witnessing Tom’s eagerness to deliver his note.
