Page 48 of The Earl's Forbidden Governess
“Is that all you have to say?” Edward demanded, frustration bubbling up inside him. He wanted her to rage, to cry, to show some sign that she cared.
Catherine’s eyes flashed. “What would you have me say, My Lord? That I think you are making a terrible mistake? That the thought of you marrying her makes me physically ill?”
“Yes!” Edward exclaimed, taking a step closer. “Tell me how you really feel, Catherine. For once, just be honest with me!”
“Honest?” Catherine’s voice rose to match his. “You want honesty? Fine. I think you are a coward, Edward Montague. You’re so afraid of getting hurt, of taking a risk, that you’re willing to settle for a loveless marriage rather than admit that there might… be something between us.”
Edward reeled back as if he had been slapped. “You don’t understand,” he growled. “I have responsibilities, duties…”
“Oh, spare me!” Catherine interrupted, her eyes blazing. “You hide behind your duties because you’re terrified of living, of feeling! Well, let me tell you something, Edward. Love is not safe or convenient. It’s messy and complicated and sometimes it hurts like hell. But it’s also the most beautiful, transformativeforce in the world. And you’re throwing it away for what? A life of regret and what-ifs?”
Her words hung in the air between them, heavy with truth and unshed tears. Edward stood frozen, his heart pounding in his chest. Everything he thought he knew, every carefully constructed wall, was crumbling in the face of Catherine’s passion.
“Catherine,” he whispered, reaching for her.
But she stepped back, shaking her head. “No,” she said, her voice breaking. “I can’t do this anymore, Edward. You wanted honesty? Well, there it is. I hope you’re satisfied.”
With that, she turned and fled the room, leaving Edward alone with the echoes of her words, and the shattered remains of his certainty.
Chapter 21
Catherine paced the length of her bedchamber, her hands clenched into fists at her sides. The events of the evening played on an endless loop in her mind, each memory stoking the fire of her anger. She could still hear Isabella’s condescending tone, still feel the sting of Edward’s revelation.
“Engaged,” she muttered, the word tasting bitter on her tongue. “To that insufferable woman.”
She paused at the window, gazing out at the moonlit grounds of Wessex Manor. How quickly everything had changed. Just days ago, she had harbored hope that perhaps... but no. It was foolish to even entertain such thoughts.
A sharp knock at the door startled her from her brooding. “Go away,” she called, not caring if she sounded petulant.
The door opened anyway, and Catherine whirled around, ready to berate whoever had dared to ignore her wishes. The words died on her lips as she saw Edward standing there, his face a mask of conflicting emotions.
“What are you doing here?” she demanded, her voice low and dangerous.
Edward stepped into the room, closing the door behind him. “We need to talk, Catherine.”
She laughed bitterly. “I believe we’ve said all there is to say, My Lord. Or did you come to gloat? To rub salt in the wound?”
“Damn it, Catherine,” Edward growled, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Can you not see that this is tearing me apart as well?”
Catherine’s eyes flashed dangerously. “Tearing you apart? You made your choice, Edward. You chose duty over... over whatever this is between us.”
Edward took a step closer, his eyes intense. “And what exactly is this between us, Catherine? You speak of love, of passion, but what do you truly know of such things?”
“I know enough,” Catherine shot back, lifting her chin defiantly. “I know that what I feel for you is more real, more powerful than anything I have ever experienced. And I know that you feel it too, even if you’re too much of a coward to admit it.”
Edward’s jaw clenched. “A coward? Is that truly what you think of me?”
“What else am I to think?” Catherine’s voice rose. “You hide behind your duties, your responsibilities. You’d rather marry a woman you don’t love than take a chance on something real.”
“And what would you have me do?” Edward demanded, closing the distance between them. “Throw away everything I’ve worked for? Disgrace my family name? For what? A dalliance with my sister’s governess?”
The words hit Catherine like a physical blow. She staggered back a step, her eyes filling with tears. “Is that all I am to you? A potential dalliance?”
Edward’s expression softened, regret flashing across his face. “Catherine, I...”
But she was beyond listening now. Every ounce of her pent-up frustration and longing burst forth like a dam breaking. “You arrogant, pig-headed man! Do you think I chose to fall in love with you? Do you think I wanted to risk everything I’ve worked for? My reputation, my future... all of it hangs by a thread because of my feelings for you. And for what? To be dismissed as a mere dalliance?”
Edward stood frozen, his eyes wide. “You... you have fallen in love with me?”
