Page 15 of All or Nothing
“Hey, Xollen?” I asked during a lull in our conversation. “Do you think you have any spare clothes that would fit me that I can borrow?”
His violet eyes widened, the colors swirling slightly faster. I’d noticed that happening earlier, too: it seemed like whenever his emotions got stronger the swirling also got faster. Except when he’d gotten sad for me—then they’d basically ground to a halt. It made his eyes so expressive and interesting to look at.
“Ohvrakaash, of course, Joss. I’m not sure if I will though…” a part of me braced, waiting for him to call attention to my size, “…because you are so much smaller than me,” he finished.
I wanted to snort. He’d called mesmall. I guess compared to him though, Iwaspretty short.
“Would you like to go through my spare clothing in my quarters and look for something?” He put his hands up. “I will leave you alone to do this, I’m not trying to do anything inappropriate!”
I smiled, softening towards him even more. “Yeah, that sounds great. Thanks so much, Xollen.”
He smiled back, his cute little fangs glinting in the ship’s bright light. We stood and he led me down the short hallway I’d taken earlier to get to the rec room, but in the opposite direction. Thanks to my translator implant I could read the signs, I realized, though it was really trippy: if I just focused on how the signs looked, it was obvious they weren’t in English, and all I could see was the alien lettering. But if I looked at them like I was trying to read them, I could understand them. It hurt my brain so I tried not to think about reading signs and other text too much.
Man, they had fucking brain manipulating universal translators but they didn’t havecomic books? This end of the universe was weird as fuck.
The hallway ended in a little cul-de-sac kind of thing with three doors. One was marked “Maintenance”, another “Cargo”, and the third “Quarters”. Xollen approached the third one, the door opening with a faint scrape at his approach.
“It’s keyed to my ID chip,” he explained as he led me through. “So I have to let you in but you can leave on your own.” He stepped aside, ushering me into his quarters. He pressed a button on a wall panel and the door stayed open. I felt a rush of gratitude for his thoughtfulness. I wasn’t afraid that he’d try anything, but it meant a lot to me that he’d realized I might not like being shut up in a room alone with a guy I didn’t know that well.
The next time I saw Uraka I was going to punch her in the tit for being so mean to him. He really was so thoughtful and kind when he didn’t have to be.
It was a small room, only about half as big as my bedroom back home, but it was nice. Everything was clean and neat, the colors all soft neutrals: dove gray walls, beige upholstery, and black and steel fixtures. The only spot of color was a drawing of a gorgeous alien flower stuck to the wall above the bed. I gasped when I saw it, heading for it without thinking.
“Oh my god, Xollen, did you draw this?” I asked, just barely resisting the urge to reach out and run my fingertips over the drawing. It was even prettier up close: bright, detailed, but highly textured in a stylized kind of way that made me want to pet it. I looked over my shoulder at him and saw that he was blushing, his eyes swirling.
“Yes, I did. You…you like it?”
“Iloveit,” I beamed at him. “You’re seriously so talented, oh my god.”
He smiled, blushing harder. “Thank you. It’s really nothing though, it barely qualifies as art.”
I snorted, rolling my eyes. “Oh please,” I told him, putting my hands on my hips. “You have it pinned up above your bed so you have to think it’ssomething, dude. You’re good at this, own it!”
He ducked his head, making all of the jewelry he wore on his horns jingle softly. I bet he could get a pretty penny for that stuff if he sold it, now that I was thinking of it. If he had more stuff like that at his house then he’d probably be alright for a while, even without a job.
He thanked me again, his voice sounding a little tight, then led me over to a panel that he said was for storing personal effects.
“I don’t have much on me, I’m afraid,” he was telling me as he swiped up on a little pad in the wall. “Since I was just—running an errand on Quellor, I didn’t bother bringing many clothes.” The panel slid up smoothly, revealing a tightly-packed wall of fabric. It looked ready to burst.
I cocked an eyebrow at him, giggling. “Oh, just a couple of outfits, then?” I asked sarcastically. Xollen blushed again.
“It looks like more than it is!” he insisted, his slim tail with its tufted tip whipping through the air behind his legs like an irritated cat’s. “These things are always weirdly shaped and hard to get stuff into.”
“Suuure,” I agreed, giving him a great big wink.
He chuckled, smiling at me shyly before turning and making his exit. He told he’d be in the control room if I needed him. Then I was alone in Xollen’s bedroom.
I immediately went to his bed, burying my face in his pillow and breathing in his spicy-sweet smell. God, he smelledincredible. I didn’t know if it was his cologne or what, but I couldn’t seem to get enough of it. It didn’t smell exactly like anything I’d encountered on Earth, but it reminded me of walking into a coffee shop on a chilly autumn evening, the smell of coffee and cinnamon mixing with the smell of the rain outside. I seriously needed to figure out a way to bottle that smell.
Eventually I tore myself away from his neatly-made bed and started picking through his closet. There were a lot of frilly shirts, which surprised me since what he was wearing right now was pretty normal-looking: a black long-sleeved shirt with a collar that was somewhere between a crew neck and a turtleneck, and olive green pants with a bunch of extra pockets that hugged his long legs. But there was stuff in this closet that had crazy patterns, ruffles, dangly bits, even a kind of glitter on some of them.Okay, so he’s a bit of a peacock, I thought with a smile, letting a metallic silky-smooth sleeve slip through my fingers.He’s used to being rich so I guess that makes sense.
I pulled out a ruffly coral shirt that felt like it had some stretch and decided to try it on.
I stripped off my ratty old shirt, wincing at the huge hole in the armpit, and carefully slipped my arms into Xollen’s shirt, hoping I wouldn’t feel the telltale resistance that meant it wasn’t going to fit, but even if it wasn’t the most comfortable thing it fit just fine. It made a cute shirt dress, coming down to my mid-thighs. The fabric carried more of his addictive smell, and I took a minute to picture him wearing it, the flowy fabric skimming over the long lean lines of his body, the coral color popping against his mint-colored skin. He’d lookdelicious.
I kept digging through the closet, hoping to find something that I could use as pants. It was a little chilly on the ship, and I wanted to be able to sit without worrying about flashing anyone.
All of the bottoms were full-length pants, and too tight besides, not quite making it over my womanly hips, but there was so much leg to the couple of pairs I tried that I didn’t think I’d be able to wear them anyway. There was only so much you could cuff, and I didn’t want to mutilate Xollen’s nice clothes. However, just when I was ready to give up, I spotted something that looked like a maxi skirt. I grabbed it, yanking it out of the tightly-packed closet, and saw that it was more like harem pants, with super wide and flowy legs. Very 2000’s. I snorted, taking them off the hanger and slipping them on under the shirt. I let out a deep sigh of relief when they fit. I had to pull them up above my hips in order for the band to not dig into me, but overall they were comfortable.
