Page 76 of The Art of Sinning
Out of nowhere, he remembered what she’d said the day Knightford had shown up:God forbid I look like anything but a delicate flower for my portrait.
Like Shakespeare’s famous heroine, the lady clearly protested too much. Ruston had succeeded with her because he’d found her weakness—her secret desire to be considered as dainty and delicate as other English ladies. That was why she’d initially chosen such boring clothes for her portrait, why she’d melted when she thought Jeremy had made her look pretty in his first sketch.
She might be fierce and bold, but even Yvette desperately wanted to be seen as feminine. Unfortunately, in her society the feminine ideal was dainty and delicate. It made him want to shake her, then kiss her until she was left in no doubt about her femininity.
He chose his words carefully. “You aren’t remotely delicate, that’s true.” When her gaze shot to him, vulnerable, uncertain, he added softly, “Because delicate things break. They don’t withstand the blows of life. You are made of stronger stuff, made to persevere, and thank God for it. The world needs more women like you.”
Hannah had been delicately made. Perhaps that was one reason he’d always found it so difficult to be close to her. Even though she possessed ample strength of character and conviction, he’d always been afraid he might hurt her physically somehow.
Odd how he never feared hurting Yvette physically. What he feared was that he wouldn’t get enough of her. That he wouldn’t assuage his need hard enough, fast enough, deeply enough—
Oh, God, don’t think of her like that, or you’ll soon be doing more than just sitting on this bed.
He cleared his throat and bent forward, hoping to mask his wayward prick. “And just because the lieutenant proved to be a devil in the end doesn’t mean that what he said about your charms was a lie.”
A snort was her only answer.
“So,” he said, to prod her on, “he pretended to be your friend.”
“And more.” She played with the ties of her wrapper. “He persuaded me to go with him unchaperoned on long walks through the woods. He persuaded me to let him steal a kiss here and there.”
Jeremy’s arousal vanished, replaced by a jealous anger that he dared not show—that he didn’t even approve of, for God’s sake. “More than one kiss, then,” he said, hoping he sounded nonchalant.
“Yes. Toward the end of his stay, he mentioned marriage. I told him I’d be honored to marry him, and I would wait for him to ask permission of my father in London.” With her head bent, her hair veiled her face, but he could hear the consternation in her voice. “That’s when he became... a bit strange.”
“Strange?”
“He said that given his lack of connections, he knew my father would never approve a marriage. So it was best that we take matters into our own hands and elope.”
“And you told him to jump off the nearest cliff, I hope,” Jeremy growled.
She shot him an exasperated look. “Have you forgotten that I fancied myself in love? At that point I was incapable of cold-blooded logic. When I was with him, his proposal seemed perfectly acceptable. The problem was, when I was away from him—”
“You came to your senses.”
“Somewhat.” She shook her head. “The funny thing is that Papa probably wouldn’t have stood in the way if Lieutenant Ruston had gone the usual route to marriage. By that point he’d begun to realize that I wouldn’t easily find a husband. I’m sure he would have considered a naval lieutenant to be perfectly acceptable.”
Jeremy mused on that. “Perhaps your father would have. But I’m sure Blakeborough would have had a say in it, andhewould have put his foot down. He would have had the man’s prospects investigated, and when he found what the lieutenant was apparently trying to hide, your brother would have put a quick end to that courtship.”
“Do you really think so?” she asked wistfully.
“I do. And apparently so did the lieutenant, which is why he pressed the elopement.”
“I suppose.” She fell into a long silence, clearly musing over this new way of looking at things.
“In any case, you obviously didn’t elope.”Thatwould have gotten out somehow. Elopements were hard to keep secret.
“No, but not for any lack of his trying.” She let out an enormous sigh. “When I expressed concern over the idea of running away together, the lieutenant became more, shall we say, aggressive physically.”
Jeremy rose, his blood roaring in his ears once more. “What does that mean, exactly?”
His temper must have showed in his voice, for she cast him a startled look. “Not what you’re clearly thinking, and nothing even as devilish as what you did. I always squelched his attempts to... er... caress me.” She added archly, “He wasn’t as sly at it as you are. Or as good.”
Out of habit, he said flippantly, “No one is.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Don’t play the rogue with me, Jeremy. I know you better now.”
So she did. “You still haven’t told me how he managed to blackmail you.”
