Page 5 of The Pleasures of Passion
“I’d find a way to get there.” Tears filled her eyes.
“Don’t cry, sweeting. Please, I can’t bear it.” Thumbing a tear away, he said, “I’m not giving up on you, on us. If you need to reach me—whenyou need to reach me—let my father know. I’ll tell him to expect to hear from you. He can get a letter to me, and we’ll arrange matters so you can follow me.”
“I will, I promise.” She gazed into the face she loved so well and fought back more tears. “But I can’t go yet.”
He nodded, as if he couldn’t trust himself to speak.
“So I suppose this is farewell,” she choked out.
“Au revoir,” he said fiercely. “Not farewell. Never farewell.” He brushed a kiss to her lips, then stared into her eyes so longingly it made her ache. “If you change your mind about going with me today, I’ll be on theCordovan. It sets sail shortly after sundown. Ask for Mr. Lindsey—that’s the name I’m using abroad—and they’ll direct you to me.”
“Be careful,” she whispered.
Then, before she fell apart completely, she walked out to where Gilly stood. And as she left the park, while Gilly peppered her with questions, all she could think was,Will I ever see him again?
Despite his insistence onAu revoir,she very much feared that she would not. And that realization shattered her heart.
The sun was setting over the Thames as Niall stood on the deck of theCordovan, scanning every bonnet on the crowded dock in hopes of spotting Bree’s face and chestnut curls. But the hollow feeling in his gut told him the truth—she wasn’t coming. He was utterly alone.
Unbidden, the exchange he’d overheard between her and Gilly popped into his head.
Only think what your mama will say when she hears you’ve snagged an heir to an earl!
I haven’t snagged anyone yet.
His hands clenched on the rail. Bree hadn’t meant that the way it sounded, so . . . so calculating. If she’d been trying to reel him in, she would have agreed to go with him, for God’s sake.
“The captain tells me that you should have a good voyage.”
He stiffened. Father had come to see him off.
Facing the man who’d engineered his escape, he asked, “How is Clarissa?”
“Your sister is as well as can be expected, under the circumstances.” His father’s eyes sparked with futile anger. “I can’t believe the girl was fool enough to trust that bastard Whiting, even for a few moments.”
“It wasn’t her fault. She fancied herself in love.”
Just like Bree, who’d methimalone regularly because she’d trusted him not to hurt her. Because Niall had persuaded her he could be trusted, that his reputation as a rogue was greatly exaggerated.
Apparently Whiting had convinced Clarissa of the same thing. So Niall could hardly blame her for going off alone with the man. But he could damned well blame Mother, the worst chaperone in London. She should have done better in warning his sister about the dangers a devil like Whiting could present.
Last night, Clarissa had been raped. This morning Niall had killed her assailant. And he couldn’t tell a soul, because the world knew only that he and Joseph Whiting had dueled. Clarissa’s reputation and future were intact and would stay that way as long as everyone kept quiet.
“Were you able to convince Mrs. Whiting to hold her tongue about why her son and I dueled?” he asked his father.
“For now. We’re very fortunate that Whiting was hoping for a marriage to Clarissa and thus didn’t tell anyone else why you two fought. Now that he’s dead, no one will learn of it unless Mrs. Whiting speaks, and she swears she won’t. She doesn’t want her son’s name dragged through the mud any more than we want Clarissa’s ruined. But I can’t guarantee that Mrs. Whiting will keep to her word if you’re hauled before the court.”
“One more reason I must leave England.”
“Yes. Perhaps someday I can find a way to change the situation, but for now . . .”
It was highly unlikely that Niall would be returning. Yet he still didn’t regret what he’d done, just that he couldn’t reveal the truth to Bree.
He didn’t dare. Not even to her. Clarissa now had a chance at a good life despite what had happened to her, and that was all that mattered.
Even if it meant he lost Bree.
No, blast it, he wouldn’t lose her! He couldn’t. Which was why he had to tell Father about her.
