Page 20 of The Study of Seduction
But Clarissa wasn’t Jane. She took nothing—other than Durand’s obsession, apparently—very seriously. And even if shewantedto marry Edwin, he would never consider marrying her. If he ever got close to the bright flame that was Lady Clarissa Lindsey, she would singe him but good. He’d rather be alone than to wed her and find that her infatuation was temporary.
He refused to have his heart pummeled when she lost interest in her husband and moved on to her next conquest. He refused to wake up one day, like his mother, to discover that his marriage was all a lie. That his spouse had never been in his corner. That Clarissa’s love or infatuation or whatever one called it could not withstand the rough times of a marriage.
Edwin had watched his mother die with his father’s name on her lips and her heart breaking, and all because Father had been off at a private opium club in London, indulging in his favorite vice to erase his memories of the past. Even “love” had not prevented his father from sinking into that abyss.
Before Edwin would risk having that happen tohim, he would settle for a perfectly conventional, boring union with some responsible chit who was happy to live the usual life of a well-bred lady—bearing him children and managing his household and not making him think or feel.
Because quiet comfort with any ordinary female was surely preferable to a possibility of untold pain with a certain frivolous beauty.
Five
Meeks’s Mechanical Museum had probably never seen such an influx of people. But having been appropriated by Lady Maribella’s parents for her eighteenth birthday, it was overrun with the beau monde in full flower, oohing and ahhing over such creations as a tiny clockwork coach drawn by two horses, and a mechanical flute player, which, once wound up, entertained an entire room.
Clarissa turned her attention to Edwin, who was frowning as he observed a mechanical spider in its advance forward. “You don’t look very pleased,” she said. “I’d think you’d be delirious at being able to attend a social occasion you can actually enjoy for once.”
“I would be happier if Meeks had added anything new since the last time I was here.”
“When was that?”
“Two months ago. I brought the lads.”
Ah yes, from Preston Charity School for Boys, which Edwin supported. Thanks to Yvette, Clarissa and her mother had given to the cause more than once themselves. “I’m sure they enjoyed it immensely.”
“They seemed to. They usually do.”
“Usually? How often do you come here, for pity’s sake?”
He shrugged. “A few times a year. More, if I hear that there’s something new. It provides an excellent counterpoint to the lads’ lessons in physics and mathematics.”
“And I suppose you also get ideas for your own creations,” she teased.
A faint smile crossed his lips. “That, too.”
“One day I hope to see these automatons of yours.”
“So you can mock my endeavors the way Yvette does? No, thank you.”
She patted his arm. “I wouldn’t do that.”
“You’ve spent the past three days critiquing my manner of speech, my behavior toward ladies, and my opinions. I can hardly see why you would stop at mocking my favorite pastime.”
“If you would actually pay attention to my criticisms,” she said with a sniff, “I’d have no need to continue them.”
He lifted an eyebrow. “I doubt that. I suspect that you enjoy giving directions.”
“Only when they’re heeded.”
“I heed them when I can. But I doubt I will ever succeed in making my manner of speech ‘amiable’ enough to satisfy your stringent requirements.” His voice hardened. “And I amnotgoing to alter my opinions about life and the world simply to acquire a wife.”
“I don’t want you to alter them. Just don’t voice them to ladies.”
“So I can surprise my wife on our wedding night when she finds out what I really think? That hardly seems a good plan.”
She huffed out a frustrated breath. “You’rethe one who asked me to help you. I assumed that it meant you would accept my help.”
He cursed under his breath. “I’m trying.” With a glance about the room, he changed the subject. “At least there’s no sign of Durand. For a while there, he seemed to be at every event we attended.”
And Edwin had bared his teeth every time the man had ventured near her. Indeed, the earl’s fierce protectiveness toward her had come as a shock. He’d never before seemed to care so deeply about what happened to her.
