Page 45 of Sophie's Ruin
“We need to make them pay,” I repeated, looking up at him.
My voice sounded strange to my ears as the ice in my veins spread to my entire body, making it cold and heavy. I shivered as the darkness draped over my heart, craving retribution. The oily feeling was nothing new. It had stayed away while Henry and I had showered and made love, but it was back now, hungry and demanding. It urged me to get out of bed and go on a hunt for the remaining clan leaders, to spill their blood and break their bones.
“Revenge? Is that truly what’s on your mind right now?” Henry asked, staring at me in disbelief.
“How can it not be when I’m looking at the remnants of the savage wounds on your chest?” I asked, my voice rising.
“Then you should focus on my face instead. What do you see in my eyes?” he demanded.
Heart pounding, I refocused on the emotions shining in his gaze. What I saw almost crowded out the darkness, but the oily feeling remained, pushing back, growing roots, and establishing its presence. I tried to pull the black drape off my heart, but it clung to it, wrapping around it, sealing on tight.
When I didn’t respond, Henry stared at me for a moment longer as if not recognizing who was in front of him before he shifted off me and left the bed. Immediately missing his weight on me, I brought my thighs together and lifted my burning eyes to the ceiling to keep the tears at bay. I was still cold, but now it wasn’t just from the darkness but also from missing Henry’s closeness. How had we ended up like this? We’d gone from being as close as we could possibly be to having this abyss between us. The bed I was lying on felt like an island, and I was completely and utterly alone on it. Henry was still in the room, pulling onsome clean clothes he’d retrieved from the dresser, but it felt like he was hundreds of miles away.
Refusing to linger on this lonely island, wallowing in my misery, I drew in a shallow breath and got out of bed. Moving with supernatural speed, I grabbed the Tear from the pocket of my pants lying in a heap on the floor in the bathroom and swept from the room. Henry didn’t try to stop me, and I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or disappointed. I dashed through the empty house until I reached my bedroom, where I quickly got dressed in black pants and a matching tunic, before hanging the amulet around my neck. A knock sounded a moment later.
“Can we talk?” Henry asked when he walked in.
I stilled before the vanity, my features turning harsh in the mirror. They softened slightly when I glanced at him and saw the raw vulnerability return to his face.
“Sophie,” he said low, closing the distance between us. I turned from the mirror, and he stopped before me, lifting his hands to cup my face. The gesture was sweet and tender, thawing some of the ice that had coated my insides. “I love you.”
Everything stopped as if Henry had frozen time with those three little words. He had uttered them so simply, as if saying them was the easiest thing in the world. And perhaps it was for him. But not for me.
I love you, too,danced on the tip of my tongue. Yet, I didn’t open my mouth to let the words out. I just stared at Henry, his deep-blue eyes drawing me in. I wanted to drown in them, in him. But I couldn’t. Not until the clans had paid for what they’d put us through. Ididlove Henry with everything that I was, and it was because I loved him that I couldn’t let what the clans had done go unpunished.
Henry’s eyes shuttered as the silence between us stretched. He wanted me to tell him—to say the words he’d just told me, but I couldn’t. Not yet. For I knew if I said them, I wouldn’t want tofollow through with my revenge. I would want to stay by his side, right here in this room, wrapped up in our love and in him.
Those stormy blue eyes searched my face as his dark brows wrinkled. “What happened to you while I was gone?”
“Gone?” An unexpected laugh burst out of me, but there was no humor to the sound. “You say it like you went on a trip. Henry, you were tortured and starved. You weren’tgone. You were held captive at the clans’ mercy.”
“It’s over now,” he said vehemently, his eyes fastened on mine. “I’m back here. With you.”
“But the others are still on the loose. We have to hunt them down and make them pay,” I said just as vehemently.
Henry recoiled from me. His hands dropped from my face before he dragged them through his tousled hair.
“I don’t want to make them pay. I just want to stay here. With you. Sophie, I just told you I loved you. I am in love with you. Isn’t that enough?”
“No.” The word was out before I could stop it.
Henry bristled as if I’d delivered a physical blow. At once, I wished my magic could turn back time so I could go back to a few seconds ago and undo the damage I’d done.
“No?” he whispered, his expression one of impossible sadness and loss.
And we had lost something, hadn’t we? From now on, our relationship would be defined by before and after.BeforeHenry had confessed his feelings to me, and I’d told him they were not enough, andafterour beautiful bond had become irrevocably tarnished. I wished I could go back and change the past, but I couldn’t; I could only move forward.
“Nothing will ever be enough until we make them pay,” I said with a surge of determination.
Henry’s eyes glistened as his throat worked on a swallow. “There is nowe, Sophie. You’re on your own.”
Now it was my turn to bristle. “You’re not coming with me?”
Henry shook his head instead of replying.
Shocked, I stared at him. He stared back as neither of us spoke for a few seconds.
“I don’t want you to go,” he finally said, breaking the tense silence. Hope flared in his eyes as he reached up and gently pressed his fingertips to my cheek. “Don’t go,” he added softly, resting his forehead on mine. “Stay with me. Please.”
