Page 112 of Lust & Lies
I could tell her we were going on a trip, a romantic getaway. I could use this as a chance to renew our vows, but get married for real.Damn it.I lowered my head to the bed. I was so damn tired of lying to her, of coming up with cover stories.
She deserved better than to have me dancing around the truth. I’d built this pretty little world for her and filled it with roses, fairy tales, and sweet half-truths, hoping that maybe, just maybe, it would be enough to keep her here with me.
But it wasn’t enough. Not anymore. Every time she smiled at me, guilt hummed through me. Every time she reached for me, I wondered if she’d still reach for me if she had her memory back.
Right now, she trusted and loved me. Tomorrow, all of that could change. My love for her outweighed the guilt, but I couldn’t keep this up. Danger was closing in on us. She needed to know the truth so she could understand the dangers lurking around us.
So she could be on guard in case something happened and I failed to protect her. For her safety, I had to sit her down and tell her everything. Every detail. Every lie. Every scheme. I had to tell her that this new life I’d given her was built on lies.
That it was all meant to keep her here, to keep her with me. I had to explain it all to her and hope she’d forgive me. Whether she forgave me or not, we had to leave here. Grandfather’s dogs were sniffing too close.
When I revealed the truth to her, she would hate me for a while. She’d yell. Maybe try to kill me. Whatever she did,however she reacted, I could take it. She could throw things. Curse me. Hit me. Stab me. The only thing she couldn’t do was leave me.
I sighed again. The lying had to stop. I was done. I’d tell her everything tomorrow over breakfast, right after I hid the knives and other sharp objects. Decision made, I rose and moved toward the bathroom to take a shower, hoping it would calm my mind and my heart.
Yet, there would be no calm mind or heart until I figured out how the hell I was going to tell my wife that I wasn’t really her husband.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
NOELLE
I OPENED MY EYES THEsecond I heard the bathroom door close. He was gone. Relief washed over me. I’d been worried that he would try to pull the covers back and check to see if I was really asleep.
Or worse, try to wake me up so we could talk or something. I didn’t want to face him right now. I remained lying there, cover pulled over my head, listening to the sounds coming from the bathroom, dreading the moment he climbed into bed.
He must’ve speed-washed because he wasn’t in the shower for long. My body tensed when I heard the doorknob turn. He was coming. I listened as he moved around the room. Even mad at him, I still had the urge to sneak a peek at his naked form.
I couldn’t believe he’d used all that cock to cheat on me. Who was she, the bitch he’d slept with? Had she choked on his cock like I had? Did she suck it better than me, ride it better than me? I doubted it.
Since he wanted to share his community dick, I should cut it off so his hoes could pass it around easier. I squeezed my eyes shut and reigned in my anger. I couldn’t be mad at the woman orwomenhe’d screwed.
They didn’t owe me any loyalty. My husband did. No one forced him to stick his cock where it shouldn’t be. He’dmade that decision himself. Yet, he was walking around here pretending he was in love with me, loyal to me.
I think that was what hurt the most, the fact that he was using my condition to lie to me. Tears stung my eyes.Fuck them tears.I wasn’t crying over Aiden Park ever again. I took a few deep breaths and released them slowly, quietly.
I couldn’t crash out just yet. I didn’t have all the facts yet. All I had were bits and pieces. Memory fragments. I needed to stop getting all worked up and save that energy for when I was certain of the truth.
I heard the rustle of fabric as he slid his clothing on. I kept my eyes shut and breaths even as the mattress dipped behind me. He eased in slowly, careful not to wake me. How sweet! How thoughtful!
Not!
Aiden inched closer to me. I pressed my lips together, resisting the urge to yawn because that would give me away. When his arm slid around my waist, pulling me back against his chest, those irritating ass butterflies began flitting around in my belly.
Clearly, my body hadn’t gotten the memo that we were mad at him. Neither had my pussy.Calm down, girl. We don’t do community dick.I almost lost it when he snuggled up against me and pressed a kiss to my shoulder.
If he tried to wake me up for sex, I would lose my fucking mind. Luckily, he relaxed, behind me, spooning me, holding me close.
“Good night, my heart,” he whispered.
Damn it!I would not cry. I would not let a few sweet words weaken my resolve. ButGod, I loved this man and didn’t want to lose him. I remained still, faking my sleep as I listened to the sound of his breathing.
Being in his warm embrace made it hard for me to keep my eyes open. I suppressed another yawn as my eyes drifted shut. I fell asleep wrapped in the arms of a man who’d once made me cry. But even in my sleep, I couldn’t escape him. He haunted my dreams.
In this dream, I was back to seeing things through my own eyes instead of watching from the sidelines like I’d done in my previous dream. In that dream, my focus had only been on me, and I couldn’t see the person I was speaking to.
Probably because my mind had wanted to show me just how much pain I’d been in because of Aiden. In this dream, I couldn’t see myself, but I could see everything around me, and unlike that last dream, this time I could feel the pain Dream-Me was experiencing.
Aiden and I were in the middle of an argument, voices echoing down a hallway I didn’t recognize. My heart thundered in my chest as I spun away from him, storming off, done listening to his bullshit.
