Page 9 of Tank
“She’s my girl. Beau is my son. I’m meant to protect them, keep them safe. I just feel like I let them down. Failed them.”
“Bro, you haven’t failed them, not even close. Beau is well adjusted and a happy kid now. Looking at him, you wouldn’t even know the shit he’s been through. That is because of you. You’ve made him feel safe and protected. Carrie smiles brighter than she ever has, even when we were kids. Yeah, her therapy is helping, but that can only do so much. She smiles that big, because of you and how safe, protected, and loved you make them both feel. That isn’t failing them. That is stepping up and loving your family.”
“He’s right, you know,” a little voice comes from behind us.
We both turn around to see Carrie leaning against the door, with a tear slowly running down her face.
“You amaze me with the love you show Beau and me every day. Tank is right. We do feel protected and safe with you. You never gave up hope and never stopped looking for us. I’m here. We’re here, because of you.”
Joker is out of his chair and has Carrie in his arms in seconds. Not wanting to intrude on the moment, I quietly slip off the deck and make my way round to my bike.
CHAPTERFOUR
PANDORA
I stare at my phone and hover over Tank’s number for the millionth time today. I want to call him and cancel our date. I can’t believe I agreed to it. I clearly wasn’t thinking properly, but I really did enjoy our impromptu coffee date. He was really easy to talk to, and we had common interests.
Jesus, I really am overthinking this. A girl has gotta eat, and I enjoyed his company. That doesn’t mean it has to be more than that. I can just have fun, a night out, and maybe a ride on his bike. I don’t have to give him more than I want to. For being a bad boy biker, Tank seems to be a gentleman, but then again, a one-night stand wouldn’t hurt either.
Urgh,I fling myself on the bed and cover my eyes with my arm. God, I’m being such a girl about this. Why am I so worried about a date? It’s just a date. It’s been a while since I had one, but I’ve been on them before. Okay, some were not so great, but then again, some weren’t that bad either. I just need to get a hold of myself. This is ridiculous.
Deciding I need to get out of the house and the fresh air will do me some good, I grab my leather jacket, head for the garage. I pull the cover off my baby. I love my car, but my pride and joy is my Harley Davidson Electra Glide Sport. A little unconventional for a woman, as it is a slightly larger and heavier model, but I fell in love with it the second I saw it. The paintwork is a fading sunset, going from red to orange, to yellow, with a touch of girly glitter mixed in.
Mounting my baby, I pull my helmet on and head out, riding through town and out onto the country roads. I love the feeling of freedom when I’m riding. I am the mistress of my own destiny.Jesus, what a crock.I wish I was the mistress of my own life, but sadly it was all planned out for me. I don’t come from your normal, average family. My father is a man you do not go against. His word is gospel, and you do as you’re told. I had rebelled a little, which my father only thought was cute, but he didn’t let me go too far. He'd chose my job for me, not realizing he was giving me everything I needed to get away from him and his controlling ways. It has been a few years since I’ve spoken with him. I’m sad with the way our relationship has ended, but I also feel this is the outcome that was inevitable until he sees the damage he has done. Don’t get me wrong, he wasn’t a bad father and didn’t mistreat me. He was just more controlling than normal. He had a vision he wanted for me, regardless of whether I wanted that or not.
Pulling up to the Harley store, I stop to browse. I love a good shop and today definitely calls for some retail therapy. Browsing through the store, I pick a couple of new Harley Davidson t-shirts that are cute and head for the helmets. As I’m looking at the new ones they have in, I hear a voice behind me.
“Surprised to see you here, darlin’.”
Turning around, I come face to face with Tank and what looks like a child’s helmet in his hands.
“Oh, hey. Shopping for your kid?” I ask, not knowing that he had a child and quickly going back over our conversations to check if he'd mentioned one.
“No, my godson. We bought him a bike for his birthday, so I wanted to get him a helmet with the club’s colors on it,” he says, showing it to me.
Jesus, could this guy be any more perfect?
“Do you think he would like it?” He asks me, seeming suddenly unsure of himself.
“I’m sure he’s going to love it. How did he like the bike?”
“Oh God, the kid freaked out. Running around like a crazy ass, he even ate his dinner, sitting on the bike. We even got him his own cut that says, ‘Future Son’on it,” he says with pride in his voice.
“Sounds like a lucky kid. You two close?” I ask, seeing pride glow in his eyes.
“Kid means the world to me. His name is Beau. Carrie and Joker, his folks, have been my best friends since we were knee-high. He had a rough start in life, so just making sure the rest of it is smooth sailing,” he says, getting a little dark at the end.
“I’m sorry he had a rough start, but it sounds like he’ll be fine with you in his corner,” I tell him as I rub my hand up his arm.
“I love my family, and I protect those I care about,” he replies as he softly tucks a wayward strand of hair behind my ear.
“Sign of a true man,” I say on a breath, as his fingers slowly caress my cheek.
“You're beautiful Pandora, but I see so much hidden behind them baby blues,” he whispers in my ear.
My eyes instantly find his. He’s looking at me like he can see right into my soul and see all my secrets. The connection causes me to step back, and his hand falls from my face.
“Don’t run,” he pleads.
