Page 71 of Taste of Blood
“You don’t seem sure of that.”
How do I tell her that I’m not. That I never wanted us to break up. That I missed him every moment we were apart. That I still miss him.
It’s not something I want to discuss with an outsider. That’s strictly between Cord and me. I’m having enough trouble convincing him to give me a second chance. I don’t want to have to justify our break up, because for me, there is no justification. The night he left is still too fresh in my mind.
“I can’t do this anymore.”
“Do what?”
“Pretend. Pretend it doesn’t matter. Pretend everything is all right. Because you know what, Ash? It’s not. I’m drowning here, and not only do you not care, you don’t even notice.”
“What are you saying, Cord?”
He looks at me, his eyes shining with tears. “I’m done. I’m leaving.”
“You can’t mean that.”
“No. What I can’t do is stay here any longer and pretend this is working, because it’s not. But typical you, you’re not listening to me. You only hear what you want to hear, and I don’t think you’ll ever change. Ever since Carlyle came into your life, you’re a different person. And quite frankly, I don’t like that person.”
He picks up his bag and heads for the door.
“Wait. Please, Cord. Don’t leave me. I’ll do anything. I’m begging you. I can’t…I can’t do this without you.”
“You’ll be fine. You always are.”
Ten years and the wound in my heart is still as raw as it was that night. I hadn’t cried since the night my parents died, but I cried that night. And every night after that for weeks as I realized he wasn’t coming back. That it wasn’t just another fight.
He was gone.
My world, my reason for breathing.
Gone.
But now I have a chance to get him back. And I’m not going to let anything or anyone get in the way of that.
I don’t care what I have to do to ensure that.
Because living without him is not an option.
25: Cord
DAMN ASHER. I tossed and turned all day instead of sleeping, all because he had to bring up that shit about our first time. I know that’s exactly why he did it, the manipulative bastard. Try as I might, I couldn’t get the image of him sucking my cock in that cell out of my head.
Even a long cold shower doesn’t do anything to snap me out of it. Why do I let him do this to me? You’d think I’d learn by now.
I show up at Dante’s warehouse ready to bite somebody’s head off, though I guess it’s the right frame of mind for what we’re planning tonight. Gio is huddled up with Zeke and Joshua by the weapons locker. I glance through the window of the empty office as I make my way to them.
“Where’s Dante?” I ask Gio. “I figured he’d be chomping at the bit to get a crack at this asshole.”
“He had to take care of something at one of the clubs. There’s more than just this going on.”
True, but this is pretty important. Didn’t he just say last night this was priority number one? Gio could’ve handled the club.
Unless there’s something he’s not saying. I know I should mind my own business, but I’m a nosy fucker. So sue me.
“Is this something you couldn’t handle?”
He puts down the crossbow he’s playing with and glares at me. “If you must know, three guys came into one of our dens last night and shot up the place in, and I’m quoting here, ‘the name of the Python.’”
