Page 26 of Making Haven
Finding a sturdy tree, I lean against it, trying to regain my balance. Fuck. Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe falling for him was a mistake. I should cut my strings and learn to live alone once more.
But I can’t.
Now that I know what it’s like to have Devin, I can’t go back without a fight.
I continue into the wooded area until I can hear moving water. I scent the air again, the hairs on the back of my neck standing on end. Someone has been here. Some time recently. Fuck, I should have been more careful. I should have taken patrols more seriously.
If anything happens to Devin, I’ll never forgive myself.
Thankfully, it’s only a few more minutes of stumbling before I find him. I want to approach him with care, not wanting to startle him or make a complete fool of myself. The stone I trip on apparently had other ideas.
I land in a heap on the ground with a loud humph.
“What the fuck?Lawrence?”
I look up at Devin, doing my best to give him a smile, but the look is more of a grimace.
“I told you not to follow me.”
“I know,” I say with a groan, trying my best to readjust to no avail. I’ve lost enough blood in my leg that it’s gone numb, which is not a great sign. But hey, at least the pain is fading!
“What’s wrong?” Devin moves over to me, squatting down and taking a look at my leg. “Fucking Christ.” He’s pulling a knife from his pocket, slicing my jeans even more to give himself a better view.
As carefully as possible, we get my body turned over into a sitting position. He looks it over, his brows wrinkling in a way I find entirely too endearing. I focus on that instead of my leg which looks like a mangled mess made worse by my walking on it all the way out here.
“I need--” I cut myself off, looking away. I don’t know what the fuck I need. Other thanhim.
“You need my help,” he says softly. His eyes dart over to mine for a moment before he’s looking back down. “I can’t fix this. If you were human I’d probably tie a tourniquet on the thing and do as much to repair it as possible but you’re barely bleeding.” His eyes scan over my face. “I didn’t know it was possible for you to get even paler, Lawrence.”
There’s worry in his eyes. For some reason, that’s the thing that gives me hope that we’re not completely done. There’s a chance he cares for me just the same way I care for him.
Reaching out, I touch his cheek. “Why did you leave?” I whisper.
“There was a group when this all went down,” Devin starts to say, taking a shaky breath. His dark eyes won’t meet mine. I want to ask so many questions, but I stay completely still, noteven breathing as I wait for him to go on. “I figured staying with more people would keep me safe. They’re the reason I stay alone. The things they did.” Devin pauses, biting his bottom lip. There’s a haunted look in his eyes, one that I wish I could chase away for him. He’s been through so much. I get why he pushes people away. I get why he’s an ass. He shakes his head before going on. “Ever since then, I knew it wasn’t the zombies that we should fear, it’s the other living people out there.”
I reach over and place my hand on his arms. His eyes snap up to meet mine. “I’m sorry you went through that.”
“Me too,” he says softly. “That’s why I hated you. Well, that and your fangs.” I can’t help but snort, shaking my head at him. The very last wall between us falls down, leaving both of us flayed open and exposed. We’ve laid it all on the line. “But then you were nothing like them. You’re kind and gentle and everything worth living for. I fell for you, Lawrence. But you can’t fall in love during the end of the world.”
“Why not?” I demand. I yank him forward until his face is close enough for me to kiss him, and kiss him I do. I kiss him with everything I have, needing him to know that he’s it for me. I need him to know the magnitude of my feelings.
I need him. I want him. I can’t go back to just surviving. With Devin, I’m finally living.
“It’s too late,” I tell him as we break apart. “Because I’ve fallen for you too.” Our foreheads touch, our noses brushing against each other. “Plus,” I whisper, finally letting myself smile. “I promised Her Majesty that I would bring you back home.”
“I wouldn’t want to disappoint her.”
“Thank you for finally letting me in,” I say, my insides turning to goo at how soft Devin’s eyes are. I’m not sure he’s ever allowed himself to look at me like this before. “I promise to do everything in my power to make sure to never take it for granted. I want you with me for as long as this fucked up world will allow it.”
“I’m sorry for pushing you away. I can’t promise I won’t do it again, but I’ll do my best to always come back. Okay?”
“That works for me,” I tell him, giving him another kiss. “I might need you to carry me back home.”
“I have another idea,” he says, the sides of his mouth tipping up ever so slightly, making my stomach flutter at seeing him smile. “Here.” Devin holds his wrist to my mouth.
“What?”
“Bite me.”
