Page 37 of When Sinners Rise
That’s all I’m thinking about as we drive. And, for a moment, I’m grateful just to sit in safety. With Dragon driving, he can’t hurt me. Not physically, anyway.
Shaw’s like a statue next to me, his eyes facing forward, not glancing to keep an eye on me. I thought I saw something before as he was pushing us closer to the building. Fear, maybe. Something that I’m annoyingly familiar with, especially around these men. He was worried about his brother. I’d swear to it.
Now, I’m reliving the past, every second of the trauma and pain rushing back to my mind after staring up at the building in flames.The smell of smoke and the sight of fire flashed me right back there – like it happened yesterday, and the nightmares were waiting to wrap me in frightful sleep.
I could feel Naja’s hand pulling me along as we stumbled through the burning carcass of the building to our freedom. Only we weren’t. Naja ran back inside. She needed to help Jackson.
She didn’t. Not really.
It was her conscience talking, or maybe it was her heart.
For a moment, as we drive in the quiet, I play out what might have happened if we had just gotten up off the ground, together, and walked into the streets of London.
Naja and I would still be together. Jackson might be alive. We might have found our way back home – our real home – after going to the police or the embassy.
A smile of sorts edges over my lips, fragile and delicate, as I imagine a world where things return to normal. Until I catch a glimpse of Dragon’s eyes in the rearview mirror. Any glimmer or whisp of hope shatters under that stare, and I lower my eyes, focussing on my hands in front of me, worrying them over and over in my lap.
Looking out the window, I stare blankly as the city slides past.
“Where are we going?” I ask. But neither of them answer.
It helps. It fuels my anger at them, drowning out the fear. Remembering how brave Naja was, I know I have to be more like her. It was easier with Shaw, but Dragon makes me feel like a child under his glare. Gritting my teeth, I try to squash that sentiment – it won’t do me any good.
He’s just a man. He can’t hurt me anymore than he already has.
The car slows and pulls into an underground parking garage. We park, and the brothers get out. I look down at the state of my torn and dirty clothes and wonder how anyone could look at me and not be concerned. What would I do if a girl in the same state walked past me in the street? But I know. I’d keep on walking.
It’s not Shaw who pulls me from the car.
“Remember the deal. It’s simple. Trouble for me means real fucking trouble for your sister.” He stands next to the car door and waits for me to comply.
I do.
He walks us through a stairwell and then into a hotel lobby. Shaw does his usual and pulls all the attention off us. We’re a few feet behind him, but I hear the charm in his voice when he talks to people. It’s the same charm he used on me.
My blood fizzes with rage – at him, but also at myself. How fucking stupid.
I don’t fight. I don’t scream or run. I play along and behave.
When we arrive at the room, Dragon shoves me inside before closing the door behind him. I look around at the bland space. Big double bed. Desk. Chair. Even a seating area with plush cushions.
But I hear them outside, their voices raised and aggressive. It’s not clear what they’re saying, but it doesn’t sound like a happy conversation. I linger at the door, edging closer to listen in, but then the voices stop, and the door flies open. I rush away and sit on the edge of the bed.
Shaw storms in first, running out of space in the room to pace and turning around by the window to glare at his brother. Dragon closes the door, trapping me inside with both of them. As soon as the door clicks shut, my pulse quickens, like the danger of this situation just registered and my body is catching up. A storm of tension descends as they stare at each other, linked in some silent fight. Words aren’t needed. I want to cower and make myself as small as possible, not wanting to get in the middle of whatever this is.
Dragon moves first, not taking his eyes off Shaw.
He towers over me as he comes to a stop in front of the bed. My foot burns, sending shivers of pain up my leg, remembering what he did to my skin. He tilts his head at me, sizing me up, but I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of seeing how scared I am.
My jaw clenches, and I imagine Neil standing over me. I’m about to attack, showing him my best countermoves.
I don’t.
Then he lunges forward. “Rar!”
I jump and scramble up the bed, pulling my knees up against my chest as my heart explodes in panic.
He just chuckles to himself.
