Page 71 of When Sinners Rise
“Let’s keep it simple, then. First one to finish wins.” He rubs his hands together.
“Hey, no fair. I’m not even sure I could eat half.” I push my bottom lip over my top in an exaggerated pout. “Oh, could you ask the waiter for some water?”
He turns around and I take my shot, grabbing the first slice and taking a giant bite through the gooey cheese and tomato topping.
He looks back at me, chomping through my first slice and grins, grabbing his. “Cheat,” he mutters before taking his bite.
“Holf. Eel.” I talk around the mouthful of Italian goodness and fold the next slice and feed it into my mouth, but even with the margin of a head start, Shaw is powering through like he’s not eaten in a week. He doesn’t even look like he’s trying.
We’re both trying not to laugh at each other and for a moment, there’s not a care between us. We’re on a date, no agenda, no history, just two people having fun.
“Okay, okay. I concede,” I announce, after taking a bite of my fourth slice and struggling to swallow it down. “You win.”
He smiles and keeps on eating. “What’s my prize then?”
“Bragging rights.”
“Oh, I think we can do a whole lot better than that.”
My stomach flips, not from the food but from the look in his eyes. The air charges between us as he drops his half-eaten slice, and I’m suddenly flooded with nerves as to where my feelings are taking me.
“Ready to go back?” he asks.
I look at the half-drunk beer and leftover pizza. “Sure.”
Walking over to the waiter, he looks back as he drops a handful of bills to cover the meal. Tension builds in his gaze, and I follow to head out. The evening air chills across our skin and seems to suck all of the humour from us. It’s like we’re walking back to face the music, and maybe we are, but for a moment, we were just two people trying to have fun in there.
The shadows of the church come into view, and instead of feeling solace from them, they feel ominous. Maybe that’s because I’ll have to face up to Naja and whatever this is between me and Shaw.
He leads me through the garden and into the small cottage. It’s quiet as we step inside, with no sign of Samuel or anyone else. I head over to the coffee machine, pretending to keep myself busy.
“What do you do now?” I ask, fiddling with cups. I’ve been putting off this question as I didn’t want to hear the answer.
“I guess I go back and make things right with my family.” He shot his brother the last time he saw him, so I’m not sure how that’s going to work out.
“What does that mean? You said this is it for you. You can’t go back.”
“I don’t have a choice. I can’t leave things like this. Not now I’ve involved Cane, too. It’s another line I’ve crossed.”
I turn around to face him. “That can’t be your only option.” I remember what happened at the end of that tunnel before we escaped. Nothing Shaw has said, or I’ve seen, makes me think it will be okay.
He leans on the wall. “I’m no coward, Miri. They’ve played me as that my whole life. That’s not me.”
“You can leave for London with us?” My voice is soft as the words slip out as if they didn’t mean to escape my lips.
He looks at me, and at that moment, hope erupts that he might say yes. It was a test, in a way, to see if I really wanted that. I wasn’t sure when I spoke the words.
“No. That’s not my place. I’ll be just like Reed, hunted down. You don’t know my family like I do.”
And just as quickly, that hope is doused.
My body turns for the machine again. “It was just an idea. I don’t like the thought of you in danger because you did the right thing by us. That isn’t fair.”
“Nothing is fair. What happened to you isn’t fair, but I don’t regret it because it’s put us together. In the worst fucking circumstances, but I got to see how strong you are.” Hands land on my hips, moving me so I’m looking at him again. “How beautiful you are, despite everything.”
He brushes my cheek with the back of his hand, and I cling to it, holding it to my face. My stomach grips, and my heart stutters. Such small reactions, but huge in what they might mean to my dumb head. Dumb, because isn’t that what this is? The most stupid thing in the world?
“How long do we have?” I murmur.
