Page 60 of All Night with the Cowboy
Lauren leaned on a fence post as Tanner quietly saddled up the horses, disappearing for a short time to offer her a helmet, despite the fact that he’d reappeared wearing a Stetson.
“Thanks.” She took it and put it straight on, happy to be playing it safe, especially since so many years had passed without her ever getting up into the saddle.
“Come on, I’ll give you a boost up,” Tanner said.
He led the horses out and stopped beside her, the shorter of the two, a beautiful rich red color, sniffing her hand and dipping her head low.
“Give me your leg,” Tanner said.
She picked up the reins, remembering what to do, and lifted her left leg for him to give her a boost. His hand closed around her knee as he counted to three and then lifted her high above the saddle. When she landed with a soft thump she grimaced, realizing how out of practice she was.
“Sorry,” she said, patting the horse’s neck before pushing her feet into the stirrups and sitting up straight with her shoulders back.
“You’d make a great cowgirl,” Tanner said with a wink from the other horse, already mounted up and with his heels pushed down. She noticed that first because it was the one thing she’d been worried he wouldn’t easily be able to do given his ankle injury, although she bet he’d have his foot hanging free of the stirrup before too long.
“Let’s go, gorgeous,” he said.
Lauren almost fell off the horse. So much for her professional services being required—she was starting to feel like this was more first date than therapy.
The horse she was riding obediently followed along behind Tanner’s, and she tried to relax into the saddle, worried the animal would feel her anxiety and think that her rapid heartbeat was because she was nervous of riding. In reality the only thing she was scared out of her wits about was the man riding in front of her.
“Where are we heading?” she said, almost scared to ask the question.
“Thought we’d take a walk down memory lane andride to the river. Maybe we could do some stretches there?”
Lauren gripped the reins a little tighter. Stretches? There was only one thing they’d ever done at that river spot, andstretchingwasn’t exactly what she’d call it.
***
Tanner had no goddamn idea what he was doing. Why had he decided it was a good idea to take her down to the river? It was as if he was trying to sabotage their weekend, trying to recreate something that could never be again because they were adults now, not teenagers sneaking off to make out away from prying eyes.
He dismounted when they reached the spot and held out his hand for Lauren’s reins. But as she swung her leg over, looking unsure, he let the reins go and moved to catch her, his hands to her hips helping to guide her to the ground.
Dammit. Now his hands were on her slender hips and he could feel the warmth of her through her skinny jeans. He held on too long, frozen, until she slowly spun around to face him. Lauren was breathing fast, and her eyes were wide as she looked up at him, so clearly filled with uncertainty.
“Why are we here?” she whispered.
Tanner didn’t answer her. Instead he bent, removing one hand from her hip so he could take off his hat, discarding it to the ground, and then carefully unclipping her helmet and taking if off her head. He let that fall from his fingers to the ground, too, landing with a soft thud.
Lauren hadn’t moved, but her lips had parted, and when her tongue darted out to moisten them he slowly lowered his head, waiting, giving her the chance to moveaway, before covering her mouth with his in a long, slow kiss.
She moved into him, her arms finding their way around his waist as she tugged closer, head back as he kissed her over and over again. He ran his hands down her back then up and under her T-shirt, wanting to feel her bare skin, needing to connect with her warm, soft flesh.
“What are we doing?” she murmured, pulling back, hands flat to his chest as she stared up at him. “We can’t do this.”
He groaned. “Yes. Yes we can.”
“No.” She pushed back more firmly, her hands finding his as she stood a foot away from him, her eyes still trained on his face. “We can’t keep doing this. It’s, it’s…” She looked exasperated. “It’s too hard. I should never have said yes to coming here.”
“Why can’t we just keep it casual? It worked for us in Fiji.” He pulled her closer again, hips against hers as he lowered his body again and placed a light, teasing kiss to her lips, tongue against hers. She kissed him back, hands under his shirt now, caressing his chest. But when he skimmed his palms to her butt, grinding into her, she pushed him away again. “I’ve missed you, Lauren. The last few weeks have been goddamn impossible.”
“It doesn’t matter,” she protested. “It’s too hard, Tanner. I can’t do casual and I can’t be around you like this again. It’s not fair to either of us and you know it.”
“Not fair?” he repeated. “Sweetheart, we’re both having fun, no one’s getting hurt.”
She wrapped her arms around herself and backed into the horse picking at some grass while he waited forher. “I’mgetting hurt, Tanner.I’mthe one who can’t handle this. Maybe you can, but I can’t. I’m finally starting to move on and, and I can’t go back. I just can’t.”
He stared at her, finding her words hard to digest. “You’rehurting? Honey, I was hurting for years and I doubt that caused you to lose any sleep.”
