Page 54 of A Lot Like Forever
She sighed and leaned back into Nate as his arms circled her from behind. “Hey to you, too.”
He kissed her neck, his lips warm and way too tempting against her skin. Just as it always did, a few kisses and his hard body against hers started to make her hum, and she turned in his arms, taking the opportunity to scoop her hands around his neck and pull him down for a kiss full on the mouth.
“I’m getting used to this,” he muttered as they touched foreheads, staring into each other’s eyes. “And you know what?”
She kissed him again, muttering against his lips, “What?
“It scares the hell out of me.” He wrapped his arms around her. “This wasn’t supposed to feel like this.”
Faith hugged him tight, too. “I know. We’ve kind of fallen into a happy little routine.”
“Yeah, and I’m advertising for another housekeeper already.”
Faith pushed back. “You what? But that wasn’t part of the--”
“Relax,” he said, chuckling as he dragged her by the hand into his office. It was on the ground floor near the front door. “You’re too busy to worry about the house, and to be honest, I wasn’t really comfortable with you feeling like you had to do it. This way you can focus on the work you care about.”
Heat started to rise in her body and her hands trembled. She tucked them into fists so tight that her fingernails dug into her palms. “But Nate, that’s part of our deal. That I’m supposed to do the housework in exchange for living here. I don’t want to freeload.”
He frowned and let go of her hand when they reached the leather sofa in his office. She dropped into it and he crossed the room and poured himself a whiskey, raising an eyebrow at her. Faith shook her head.
“What does it matter? I can afford a housekeeper, Faith, and it means it’s something you don’t have to worry about.”
He took a sip from the heavy crystal glass he was holding and suddenly she was wishing she’d said yes to one. This was not how things were meant to be happening. They’d had a deal. She wasn’t supposed to be freeloading off Nate; she was supposed to be keeping the house tidy and making their meals in exchange for her staying there.
“That deal we had is nonsense anyway,” he continued. “We’re way past sex with benefits, aren’t we?”
“Are we?” she asked, her voice shaking. “I know I like you, Nate, and we’re having fun, but this . . .”
His expression hardened, the steely glint of his eyes reminding her of the man she’d seen him be in front of others. The ruthless businessman, formidable, the way most other people saw him.
“You’re right, Faith. This is just a temporary thing.Fun.” The word was cold as ice when he said it. “But you don’t need to worry about cleaning the house. Surely what we do in the bedroom more than makes up for the rent you don’t pay.”
Faith felt as if he’d just slapped her across the face. Her voice caught in her throat, but she forced herself to reply, wasn’t going to let him get away with being an asshole to her. “Is that how you think of me, Nate? As if I’m a prostitute?” Where the hell had this come from? She’d arrived home happy and carefree, only to walk into an argument she hadn’t seen coming.
His lips had been drawn in a tight line, cold and unforgiving, but the moment the words left her mouth he frowned and immediately put down his drink. “No.” He slammed his hand into his desk, cursing as he did so. “Hell, Faith. No.” Nate shook his head and came toward her. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry; I should never have said that.”
She raised her chin, defiant. “You damn well should be sorry.” She knew what mean men were like, how cruel a man could be when he didn’t get his own way, and she wasn’t going to let Nate get away with it.
“I didn’t mean it, Faith. You know I don’t think of you that way.” He dropped into the sofa beside her and reached to cup her cheek, but she turned away. “I just meant that the money wasn’t a big deal to me and I don’t expect you on your hands and knees scrubbing the floor when you’ve got so much else going on. Is it so wrong that I want to look after you?”
“We said we’d do this while it was fun, Nate, and not a moment longer.” Her anger was still there, silently simmering from what he’d said.
He grabbed her hand when he couldn’t touch her face, smoothing his fingers over her skin, then lifting her hand and pressing a kiss to her palm and then the delicate part of her wrist that he knew was so sensitive for her.
“You’ve done something to me, Faith,” he admitted. “The idea of not having you here annoys me so much that I want to smack something.” He frowned when she raised her brows. “As in my desk again. Not you,” he assured her.
“What happened to not wanting to get close to anyone?” she asked, bracing herself for his answer, not wanting to have this conversation with him even though she knew they had to have it.
“I’m not asking you to marry me, Faith. I’m just saying that what we have has been . . .”
“Fun,” she said for him, repeating the word, needing to believe it. “We’ve been having fun. We’ve lived in a little bubble of fun and sex and food and no commitment. That’s why this feels so good.That’swhy it’s worked.”
He reached for her face again and she let him. “Whatever the hell we might have had hasn’t finished yet,” he told her, stroking her face so gently it almost erased all the thoughts rushing through her mind, all the worries. “Is it so bad that I want you in my bed?”
She let him kiss her, her body stirring as it always did when his lips melted against hers. “I can’t fall in love with you, Nate,” she whispered when they finally separated.
He smiled, all of the coolness she’d seen reflected in his eyes before replaced with the kindest, warmest gaze she’d ever felt trained on her. “I know. And I can’t fall for you, either. I love having you here, but I can’t offer you what you deserve.”
