Page 81 of The Love Rematch
It brings her back to high school. How many times did he volunteer to be designated driver? Had she ever seen him well and truly drunk? A beer or two maybe, but never more than that, while some of their classmates were passed out on the front lawn. Back then, she never noticed how strange that was, too consumed by her own fun to take note.
Now she wonders.
Now she questions.
Without her anger to blind her, Emily can’t help but think back to the look in his eyes after he ran from the puzzle ceremony and the hollow sound of his voice as he later confessed,Look what I did with that trust.Is that what’s holding him back? What’s always held him back?
Is he afraid of himself?
Afraid what he’ll do if he lets go?
She hates that for him.
A fire stokes to life deep in her gut, made of desperation and determination. It’s a need she can’t fight, this desire to burn his fear away. As their boisterous group wanders down the cobbled streets of Rome, her focus stays on Jake. He’s the only one not shouting loudly, the only one not smiling, still at heart the boy who preferred to stand at the top of the bleachers filming everyone else’s fun rather than partake in the fun himself.
When they come upon the Trevi Fountain, he hangs back while the assistants all rush to find a place next to the water. Against the dark night sky, the marble gleams. Beneath the towering columns of a palazzo facade, Neptune stands like a giant on his chariot, being pulled out to sea. The water glows an unnatural blue, casting everyone’s faces in a cerulean haze.
All her life, Emily dreamed of standing here. Yet instead of clamoring for a spot, she takes the opening and walks over to Jake while the rest of the crew is distracted.
“Are you okay?”
“Huh?” He turns to her, blinking, as if returning from another world. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
“You seem quiet.”
He grins, a charming grin to be sure, but shadows hang in the corners of his eyes. “I’m always quiet.”
“You weren’t quiet yesterday.”
“Yeah, well…” He shrugs. “I guess the nude thong brought something out in me. Consider me back in boxer briefs and returned to normal.”
“Jake.”
“Aren’t you going to throw a coin in?” He changes the subject and returns his gaze to the fountain as he shoves his hands into his pockets. “According to legend, the first coin ensures a return trip to Rome.”
“And the second, a love affair,” Emily says, studying the slight clench in his jaw. “And the third, a marriage. I read that in the guidebook, too.”
“Well, you’re set to be engaged in about three weeks. I’d say your odds are pretty good.”
There’s an edge to his words. Bitterness? Anger? Whatever the reason, it’s clear he doesn’t want her to go through with it. It’s also clear he’s too stubborn to admit why.
Tell me, Jake.
Let me in.
He doesn’t. He won’t.
Emily fumbles with her purse, trying to cover the shaking of her hands, and pulls out two coins. “What do you say?”
He stares at her open palm for a moment, then looks back to the group without meeting her eyes. “Go on without me.”
The others are starting to walk back. It’s not the time to confront him, so she closes her fist around the coins and gives him the space he wants. “Fine. I will.”
The second she turns around, she can feel his eyes on her back, like two laser beams pointed straight at her heart, burning their way beneath her skin. No uninterested man would watch her the way he does. His gaze is tangible. The whole walk to the water, he tracks her. She tries to ignore it, to play his game, and asks one of the assistants to take a photo of her as she throws her coin into the fountain. The second coin sits in her palm like a weight, meant for Jake.
One for a return trip.
Two for a love affair.
