Page 27 of The Love Lie
“I meant, why this job? What about it do you love so much that you’re okay giving up all your time? Because if you can’t take a break in a place like this, then I imagine when you’re home, it’s even worse. And I get it. When I’m home, the ranch comes first.Work comes first. I barely have time to get off the property. But I know why I do it. So why do you?”
She snorts. “Money.”
“Money?” He doesn’t know why he expected more. “That’s it?”
“That’s everything in this world, cowboy.”
“You really think so?”
“I know so.” She finally glances up from the screen, a bit of that spark returning. “It’s what got you here, isn’t it? Money to help your ranch. And my sister. Money to build her business. And probably everyone else on the show, willing to play whatever role and spill whatever secrets for a little access to some cold, hard cash. Money makes the world go round. And when you have it, you get to choose what direction everyone else has to spin. I made a promise to myself a long time ago that I’d be the one to control the merry-go-round, not ride on it.”
He stares at her pensively as she refocuses on her computer. There’s more to that story, he’s sure, but he knows better than to push. The worst thing to do with a spooked horse is force it. A little patience works wonders.
“But why banking?” he asks instead, keeping it surface. “A lot of jobs are lucrative. Doctors. Lawyers. Agents. Techies.”
“I like numbers.” She shrugs, then offers a sudden grin. “I was probably the first prom queen in Georgia to also be a Mathlete.”
“A Mathlete?”
“You know, on the math team?Mean Girlswas practically my autobiography.”
He arches a brow.
She shakes her head with a laugh. “We went to states, and would have won if one of the guys on my team hadn’t been so hungover he could barely see straight let alone solve a differential equation. If you think football players know how toparty, you’ve never met a nerd on a Saturday night with access to an empty house and a fully stocked liquor cabinet.”
“No, can’t say that I have.”
“Consider yourself lucky.” Then under her breath, she adds, “His naive parents. Bless their foolish hearts.”
“So math, then? Math and money?”
“And the simplicity.” She chews on her bottom lip for a moment. He’s mesmerized by the sight of her teeth biting into that plush pink skin. “It might not seem like it, but banking is pretty black and white when it comes down to it. I don’t need to make life-or-death decisions like a doctor. I don’t need to dissect every possible meaning of a single word in a contract like a lawyer, or worry about representing the wrong guy. I thought about tech for a hot second in college, but I can’t code worth a damn. Businesses are relatively simple. They either make money or lose it. The math either makes sense or it doesn’t. The numbers don’t lie. They don’t cheat. They can’t leave you. Can’t hurt you. They don’t get sick. They’re problems that can be solved. And I like that, I guess. I like knowing there’s an answer.”
Sam blinks and her pupils shrink as she returns from wherever it is that she went while she spoke. Her eyes widen slightly before she swallows. A hint of worry etches into the lines of her face, as if she’s said too much. She takes a deep breath before plastering on a forced smile.
He wants to know who lied to her. Who cheated her. Who hurt her. Who got sick. Every word out of her mouth is a revelation, but he knows enough about her to know that if he asks now, she’ll cut and run. So he offers a little bit of himself up instead to put them on even ground.
“I can understand wanting answers. I used to search for them in all the wrong places. On the back of a wild bronco. At a bar. In a stranger’s touch. Anywhere and everywhere but the one place I eventually found them—home. My mom used to say,Not everycowboy needs to ride alone. And I heard her. I knew what she meant. But I didn’t get it, not really, until she was gone.”
“Gone?”
“She passed away six years ago. Early-onset Alzheimer’s.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I appreciate that.”
“So what did she mean?”
“That I could be standing in the middle of a crowded room and still be alone. That I could be engaged, or married, or surrounded by friends, but if I didn’t open up to any of them, if I kept riding alone, I’d always be that way when I didn’t have to be. And my dad didn’t have to be. And guess what? You don’t either.”
“Me?” She rears back. “I’m not.”
“Numbers might not lie or cheat or leave, but they can’t hold you either, Samantha. And neither can money.”
A frown curves her plump lips before a sly expression overtakes her features. He watches her walls refortify in real time. “You’ve clearly never met any of my colleagues.”
“I suppose not, but—”
