Page 48 of Portrait of a Lady
She paused at the bottom of the stairs but kept her back turned to him as he leaped down the final few steps.
“I am going home,” she declared, her back rigid and her gaze fixed upon the front door. “You are not to contact me ever again. You may tell Benedict to expect the balance of what is owed for your services tomorrow.”
Dash it all, she wouldn’t even look at him. She had become a veritable fortress, her posture and demeanor telling him everything he needed to know. Anything he said now would fall onto deaf ears, and she would not believe a word of it.
“At least let me escort you home,” he offered, resigned. “It is late and I want you safe.”
She turned as if to reply, but Aubrey appeared in the studio door just then, his expression set in stone.
“I will see her home. That is, if it’s all right with you, Miss Coburn. It would truly be safer for you with an escort.”
Evelyn sighed, her jaw tightening as she seemed to mull that over. “Very well. It isn’t far...we can walk.”
He traded glances with Aubrey, who gave him a nod of reassurance before trailing after her. The door closing behind them resounded through the vestibule like a death knell, its echo rippling through his being with a startling finality.
He’d lost her. It didn’t matter that he’d already prepared himself to part ways with her. He hadn’t wanted it to be like this, and in truth, he hadn’t wanted it to end at all.
But, this wasn’t the end. He told himself that it wasn’t over until he had exhausted every means of winning her back. She was angry now, but perhaps in time he could convince her to give him a chance to prove himself. There would be no contracts or arrangements, only him earning her trust and her love with persistence.
Benedict joined him in the vestibule, looking both apologetic and somber. He clapped a hand on Hugh’s shoulder with a heavy sigh, steering him toward the open door of the small salon across the corridor.
“Brandy,” Benedict muttered. “We’re going to need lots of brandy.”
Evelyn heldher head high and squared her shoulders, determined not to fall to pieces until she could closet herself away from the world. Aubrey was making that difficult with the probing glances he kept leveling at her. He seemed prepared for her to erupt into a fit of tears at any moment, which only made her determined not to give in to the torrent of emotion ripping through her.
Aside from anger and grief, she also carried with her a heavy dose of embarrassing shame. How foolish she had been to allow herself to believe Hugh cared for her. She’d been wrestling with herself for weeks over how to tell him she loved him, certain it would only lead to him reminding her that their arrangement had nothing to do with love. Well, she’d just been reminded in the most stunningly painful way.
Our arrangement is as temporary as all the others have been…
Arrangements must be made to keep her happy…
She is paying me for the illusion of love...that doesn’t make any of it real.
Her throat constricted as she recalled every humiliating word, and the moment she had realized that she’d been duped. Oh, she hadknownbetter, hadn’t she? She’d told herself so many times not to let herself fall in love with Hugh, that she’d only get her heart broken once she remembered that every sweet word or considerate action from him was nothing more than a service for which he was being paid.
She hadknownthis from the beginning and ought not be surprised now that she’d been reminded of it. So, why did she feel so wretched and betrayed? Why did she feel as if she might die from how acutely her heart ached?
“Here.”
Aubrey’s voice startled her out of her thoughts, and she glanced up to find him extending a handkerchief to her. They’d been walking at a swift pace but had since slowed and Evelyn was mortified to realize she’d begun to cry again.
She accepted the linen square, using it to dab at her heated cheeks. She must look horrible, her face flushing an unattractive shade of red from weeping.
“I am very sorry you overheard that,” Aubrey said when she gave him back his handkerchief. “But, as Hugh said—”
“Please, she croaked. “Don’t. I don’t want to hear another word about what Hugh said or did. We had an arrangement that suited us both for a time, and now it is over.”
They turned onto her street, and Aubrey fell silent for the rest of the walk, both hands clasped behind his back as he shortened his long strides to keep pace with her. Her entire body ached as if she’d been pummeled from all sides, and all she wanted was to climb into her bed and pull the bedclothes over her head so she could weep in peace until she fell asleep. Perhaps she’d stay abed for the rest of her days, until she wasted away to nothing. It wasn’t as if anyone would miss her. Most people in this accursed city didn’t even know she existed.
They came to a stop before her townhouse, where Aubrey turned to face her as Joseph opened the front door.
“Thank you for seeing me home,” she said with a small smile. “You’ve only ever been kind to me, and I thank you for that, as well.”
Aubrey took her hand and bent over it, pressing a swift, chaste kiss to her knuckles. “There is no need to thank me. I know Hugh may not deserve your forgiveness, but...as his friend I can honestly tell you that he wants it. I don’t know anyone capable of feigning the sorts of feelings I can see he has for you. When you are ready, perhaps you might give that some thought.”
Without waiting for a response, he turned and went back the way he came, leaving Evelyn standing in the glow of the lamplight coming from inside. She made her way to her room with each step growing heavier and heavier. Evelyn felt as if she might collapse at any moment, but she managed to reach her bedchamber where Patience waited near the hearth, curled up with a book in her lap.
At the sight of Evelyn, she rose to her feet and let her book drop to the floor.
