Page 32 of Taming of the Rake
“Selfish ass,” David muttered under his breath, anger flooding his veins with heat. “A woman’s first time doesn’t have to be so miserable, Regina. He simply did not care to make it good for you.”
She sniffled, another stream of tears wetting her cheeks. “I had no idea, truly. I told myself it had been my fault. After all, Mother said I should lie still, and I hadn’t done that. I vowed to do better next time, and perhaps try to find some joy in the act. But it never got any better. The pain was never like it was that first time, but it was always the same aside from that. He would come to me, tell me to lie down, and climb on top of me as if I were a brood mare. I came to dread his arrival in my bedchamber, and was relieved when he would depart Lancashire on business. So relieved, that I said nothing when I learned of a mistress here, an actress there, an affair with a widow. If he took his pleasure with those women, he would not need to come to my bed. But, when he was at home, he came to me often … I think simply to remind me that he had the right. He knew I derived no satisfaction from the act. He didn’t care.”
David ran a hand over his face to smooth it of the rage tightening his features. For her to have trusted that bastard with her body and her heart, only for him to abuse them both … it defied all decency. David might be considered a rake, and he had freely slung his cock about for the sake of a good time, but he never preyed on the innocent. He had never treated a woman as if she were nothing more than a vessel for his own use. What kind of man was gratified by a bedmate who wasn’t enjoying herself?
“I understand,” he said, once certain he was calm enough to respond. “It cannot have been easy for you to let another man near you after eight years of that. And there hasn’t been anyone since to show you that it isn’t supposed to be that way.”
“I haven’t wanted that… until you. Even the consideration you took to make sure I was … that I was ready to receive you was more than Randolph ever gave me.”
Amusement curved the corners of his mouth over the way she had blushed at the mention of ‘receiving him.’ Married eight years, and the woman was as innocent as a maiden.
“Tolerable shouldn’t be the best you hope for,” he said, reaching out to rest his hand atop hers. “You deserve more. You deserve pleasure and comfort, and to feel safe.”
“I think I can feel safe with you. Last night, I was so overwrought because I could not understand how you managed to push past my disgust and make me feel something else. I thought there was something wrong with me, and perhaps that was why Randolph took lovers.”
Regina didn’t resist when he urged her onto the loveseat beside him, though she was still quite stiff. Refusing to be daunted, David kept hold of her hands, making it clear he wouldn’t touch her anywhere else unless she asked him to. He now better understood her requirements, as well as her standoffish reticence. Of course she hadn’t trusted him. He was a man, just like the one who had betrayed her trust and hurt her. She had every reason to be wary of him.
“There is nothing wrong with you. I daresay there was something wrong withhim. I cannot enjoy myself if the woman in bed with me isn’t having the time of her life.”
She furrowed her brow as if he had just spoken Ancient Greek. “Does that not take away from your own … exertions?”
The honest guilelessness in her question made him chuckle. Draping one arm along the back of the couch, he kept his other hand entwined with hers and leaned in close—just enough that he registered that clean, slightly-floral scent of hers with every inhale. She didn’t move, eyes wide as she stared at him.
“Itenhancesmy exertions, as you called them. You see, I simply refuse to sink my cock into a woman until she’s begging for it, until she cannot stand to wait a moment longer. Until I have found all the places on her body that make her moan when I put my lips on them. Until I have learned the feel of her, the scent of her, the taste of her. Until she’s panting and writhing and pleading with me to take her. And it does please me, Regina. It pleases me to see her trembling and clutching the bedsheets, to feel her grow so wet and hot just from the touch of my lips and the stroke of my tongue.”
Regina sucked in a sharp breath, a shiver tearing through her as her eyes went heavy-lidded. “Oh …”
“I don’t take my own pleasure until yours has been achieved. It is a rule I lived by even before I became a courtesan, and it’s one I take very seriously. I understand your reasons for this arrangement are practical, but that doesn’t mean it cannot also be enjoyable. You have endured a great deal, and were so brave to reach out to take what you wanted for yourself. Why not allow the making of your child to be an unforgettable experience?”
She flushed to the roots of her hair, though her lips twisted in a wry smile. “I stand by my earlier assessment. You are very arrogant.”
David grinned. “Let me prove to you why my arrogance is well earned.”
Her voice was low when she replied, but David hung on her every word. “It will not be easy, but I would like to try. I do not think I could bear it with anyone else, but you’ve tempted me enough to try to lower my guard. Will you be patient with me?”
“Haven’t I been thus far?”
That made her laugh, but the sound was raspy and hoarse, as if she hadn’t used it in a long time. “I suppose you have, and I thank you for it. It never occurred to me that my stipulations might be distasteful to you. I honestly assumed you would prefer it that way.”
“Now you know better.”
Her lips parted on a breathy sigh, and David felt as if all the air had been squeezed from him. He was suddenly struck with the notion that he might find his next breath somewhere within the seam of that lovely, pouting mouth. He leaned in, compelled by forces beyond his own comprehension, beyond his own will. His hair brushed her forehead, the bridge of his nose slid along hers, and his eyes remained riveted upon hers, unblinking.
“Wh-what are you doing?”
“Kissing you. At least, that’s what I’d like to be doing.”
“But we aren’t going to … not here. Are we?”
David felt torn between amusement and exasperation that she thought of kissing as nothing more than a prelude to copulation. What the devil had been wrong with Randolph Hurst?
“No,” he replied. “And the first lesson I’m going to teach you, my dear, is that very often kissing is done simply for the enjoyment of the act itself, not as a precursor to anything else.”
“Oh,” she said, as if his words were a sudden revelation. “I think that would be lovely.”
David wasted no time. Her consent freed him to close the space between them and lightly brush his lips over hers. He was seized with so many urges that he shook with the willpower it took to keep from overwhelming her. The need to consume and bite and lick were pushed aside, his trembling hands gently cradling her face as David drank from her mouth in slow, tortuous sips. His efforts were rewarded as Regina eased into his hold by degrees, meeting each brush of his mouth with tentative presses of her own. He angled his head to go deeper, opening his mouth to taste her plump lower lip. She whimpered against his mouth, inching closer on the loveseat and offering him more, her head tilting back in the brace of his hands. Only then did he dare to run his tongue along the curve of her upper lip, delving in so slowly and carefully. Regina gasped into his mouth but did not retreat. Her hands rested against his and she clung to him, tentatively pushing her tongue against his.
The gentle innocence in the gesture had David’s blood firing hot in his veins and rushing straight to his cock. A sound of pure, raw need flowed from his mouth and into hers, originating from somewhere deep in his chest. Intense hunger clawed at him from within, as if that first taste had set off something instinctive.
