Page 50 of Don't Remind Me
Dani
I wasn’tsure why I was still here.
Evan had left an hour ago after we’d successfully reviewed the rest of the symposium designs. He’d had a good number of suggestions, mostly small changes that had made a huge impact, and my ribs still hurt from laughing.
It wasn’t that Evan was funny so much as he had an ease to him that brought levity to even the smallest things. Alec was a bit like that too. But despite some definite flirting on Evan’s part, I hadn’t found myself drawn to him in that way.
Yes, the guy was gorgeous, with his subtle dimples and bright blue eyes. But looking into his eyes didn’t stir anything inside me. There was no sensation of being swept up in a storm I never wanted to escape, both exhilarated and emboldened by its winds. It was more like looking out onto a calm lake. Certainly enjoyable, but not what I wanted to feel about a romantic partner.
A friend, sure. Evan seemed okay with that. He hadn’t pushed when I’d dodged his more flirtatious comments or appeared offended when I insisted on paying for my meal. And when he’d gotten up to leave, pausing with his brows raised in a final invitation, he hadn’t rolled his eyes or stomped away when I’d shaken my head. He’d just smiled in understanding and said good night.
Six months ago, I probably would have talked myself into going with him. Rationalized my way into his bed and hoped whatever “more” I craved materialized later.
But I was tired of rationalizing myself into things. Especially when my gut was finally starting to speak up. Or maybe I’d just finally given it enough space to be heard. Whichever it was, I wasn’t ready to silence it again.
All of which left me sitting alone as the restaurant wound down around me, changing the heading colors of my production spreadsheet instead of going home to sleep.
Ishouldgo home. It wasn’t even that I was afraid to; I just…wasn’t ready to leave yet. Almost like I was waiting for something. Only I had no idea what.
“You ready to close out?” Neela asked.
I startled out of my haze. “Sure, here.” I scrounged around in my bag for my wallet and slid her my credit card.
When I sat back up, Jase stood in the doorway to the kitchen, apron in hand. His eyes locked with mine, icy blue and burning, and all at once, I was caught in the storm again.
He swallowed as he approached the bar. “I didn’t think you’d still be here.” His voice was low, almost soft, grounding me after the high energy of my night.
“I know, it’s late. I was just…” I shrugged, trying to find the right word. “Unwinding.”
He nodded, eyes never leaving mine, his gaze waking up the nerves in my body one by one like light switches being flipped on until every part of me was lit up with awareness.
Thiswas what I’d been waiting for. This connection flowing between us. I craved it the way I did doughnuts after someone brought them into the office too many days in a row. I’d gotten used to having it and hadn’t realized how much until it wasn’t there anymore.
“Here you go.” Neela laid the credit card folder beside me.
“I have some stuff to do in the office,” Jase said as I filled out the tip. I left Neela a big one to make up for occupying a seat at her bar all night. “But I won’t be long. You could stay if you wanted. Unwind a bit longer.”
My gaze returned to his, unable to resist the churning waves. “Yeah,” I said, a little breathless. “That sounds good.”
I didn’t know if the pounding of my pulse was simple, or the warmth rising to the surface of my skin as his eyes flicked to my mouth for the briefest of seconds before he walked away. All I knew was the same pull in my stomach that had told menotto go with Evan was telling me tostaynow, and nothing within me wanted to resist.
The rest of the customers left, and I made my way over to one of the couches in the dining room, kicking my shoes off and sinking into the cushions. Somehow I’d come to feel as much at home here as I did in my own apartment. A few minutes later, the kitchen staff said their good nights, and Neela headed out, locking the front door on her way.
I rested my head against the padded arm of the couch and gazed up at the nearest chandelier, my stare dancing between the hundreds of tiny crystals reflecting the light like stars clustered throughout a galaxy. I felt as though I could reach up and touch them, float into the endless sky, and drift among their light. It was a little like being drunk, my body and mind completely relaxed, but without the haze of alcohol. Something else was in its place, a current of energy thrumming beneath my skin, locking me in the present moment.
I sensed, more than saw, when Jase joined me, his presence filling the room, wrapping around me like a heated blanket. My gaze dropped to where he lowered himself onto the opposite couch, sinking down enough to rest his head against the back cushion while still looking at me, his long legs relaxed out to the sides. He’d changed out of his chef clothes into a pair of dark jeans and a navy T-shirt, everything about him unassuming yet impossible to look away from.
Music played over the dining room speakers, mellow and flowing, drowning out the city streets and anything else beyond these walls. It felt like time had stopped and the only things that currently existed were in this room.
I tracked my eyes back over the lights and gave a lazy smile. “I love it here at night.”
His deep voice washed over me, bathing me in warmth. “You don’t have to work twelve hours straight to experience it, you know. You could just come in an hour before we close.”
I smiled wider and caught his amused gaze. “I like it here during the day too. It’s a good thing you don’t serve tiramisu, or Sal might get jealous.”
His lips rose. “Maybe I’ll start.”
“You’d have your work cut out for you. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but his is the best in the state.”
