Page 6 of Letters From a Broken Heart
“This is Taylor Gaines. I’m on the heart donor list and my beeper just went off.” The words rush out of me so fast I'm surprised the lady can understand me.
There are equal levels of excitement and anxiety filling my body. I can't wait to get my transplant, but I know it’s going to be painful and there’s a chance my body could reject the foreign organ.
But I'm so close to dying. They don’t think I’ll survive much longer without a new heart.
“Ah, yes, Taylor! We might have a heart for you. We need you to get to the hospital as quickly as you can. We’d prefer you get here in the next hour so we can begin testing and make sure this heart is suitable for you. Can you do that?”
“Yes! I can be there in fifteen minutes.”
“Good, but be careful. The last thing you need to do is get into an accident right now.”
The woman gives me a few more instructions before she hangs up and I'm left staring down at my phone.
I can't believe this is happening. Who do I call first? My mind strays to Jack and I don’t hesitate to press his name in my contacts list. I place the call on speaker and begin grabbing the things I need for the hospital and recovery.
“This is Jack, you know what to do.”
My heart sinks a little when his recorded voice fills the line. I really wanted to talk to him and know he’ll be at the hospital with me, but I don’t have time for this.
“Jack! My beeper just went off! They have a heart for me! Isn't that amazing? I can't believe it’s happening so quickly. I have to go to the hospital right away, but you’ll meet me there, right? I love you, Jack. If I don’t see you before I go into surgery, I’ll be looking for you when I wake up.”
Ipress end and quickly dial Mom’s number. She answers on the second ring and the shriek of delight she lets out might’ve damaged my ear drums.
“I’ll be at the hospital in ten minutes, Taylor! Oh my gosh! You have no idea how often I’ve been praying for this. It’s going to be ok, Taylor. You’re going to be ok!”
I hang up and quickly finish getting ready. My spirits sink a little when reality hits me. This is a happy day for me, but somewhere out there, a family is mourning the loss of their loved one. I'm only getting a new heart because someone else is dead.
It takes a lot longer than I expected for them to do the testing to make sure this heart will be a good transplant for me. When the doctor finally gives me the ok and tells me to give my family hugs and I’ll see them after surgery, my heart sinks a little more.
“Why isn't Jack here?” I whisper to myself.
“Sweetheart, you said you got his voicemail. His phone might’ve died or maybe he doesn’t have cell phone reception.” Mom brushes my hair away from my face and kisses my forehead.
“Once you go back, I’ll call him and Easton. If they don’t answer, I’ll call the Maxwells. Don’t worry about it though. I’ll make sure he’s here when you wake up, ok?” Dad swallows hard and kisses my cheek.
They both smile with mixtures of emotions as I'm wheeled into the operating room. I get it, this is exciting but it’s also terrifying. Anything could happen during surgery. Anything.
I slowly blink my eyes open as the steady beep of the monitor displays my heart rate on the screen. I glance around the room and find my parents sitting on chairs next to my bed with tear-streaked cheeks.
“Hey,” I whisper in a hoarse voice. My throat is so dry and my chest hurts so much. I reach for it to rub away the pain, but freeze. It hurts because I have a new heart.
I’ve been awake off and on over the last few days. They had to keep me on a ventilator and this is the first day I’ve been off of it. The first day I’ve really been able to communicate with anyone.
I think they were keeping me sedated not only to help me heal and not to be moving around, but Mom made a comment about me freaking out with having the tube in my throat and they had to keep me sedated longer.
I'm not sure how long it’s been since my surgery, but I know it’s been a few days, if not more.
“Hi, sweetie.” Mom gives me a sad smile.
“What’s going on? Why do you look so sad?” I try to sit up a little higher in bed, but the throbbing in my chest is too much. I can't do it.
Mom glances at Dad and there’s so much pain and misery in their eyes. I frown at them, trying to decipher their unspoken conversation.Before they can say anything, the nurse steps into the room with a smile on her face.
“Miss Gaines, you did amazing. We fully believe this heart is going to take and you shouldn’t have any complications if you follow the rules. Do you think you can do that?”
“Yeah, I can do that.” I smile.
“Great. There’s someone who wants to see you. I told them they can only stay for a few minutes though; are you ok with having a visitor?”
