Page 16 of Letters From a Broken Heart
“I didn’t know, Taylor, or I would’ve told you. You have to believe that.”
“Why should I? He was your brother. Brother’s always take each other’s sides. They protect each other. It would be normal for you to help him.” As the words tumble from my lips, I realize just how much they make sense. That’s exactly what happened. They were in on this together. That’s why Easton would sometimes hang out with me even if Jack was busy.
“I’d never help him do something like that to you,” he growls. His jaw is clenched tight, making a muscle jump. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this upset, but guess what? I’m furious.
“Oh, I'm sure.” I roll my eyes and swipe angrily at my cheeks as tears spill down them. “You two probably laughed every time I left your house because you fooled me once again.”
“I’ve only ever been honest with you. I’d never do anything to hurt you!” He runs a rough hand through his hair, messing up his perfectly styled strands. Then he’s shaking his head and scrubbing his hands over his face. He looks like he’s barely containing his anger and that makes me pause.
If Easton had been willing to betray me, he wouldn’t be this broken up over me knowing. He wouldn’t look so hurt and insulted I'm seeing him for who he really is.
“Why? Why should I believe you?” I shout even louder. At this point, I don’t care if people hear us or if they find out what kind of man Jack was. Maybe I should go broadcast it at the cemetery and let Cassy get the sympathy she thinks she deserves.
“Because I love you!” He roars. “Do you know how many times I’ve almost kissed you over the years? How many times I’ve wanted to pull you into my arms and kiss you until you were so wrapped up in me you didn’t notice the world around you? Jeez, Taylor! You can't honestly think I’d help him hurt you.”
“What?” I stare at him like he’s morphed into a stranger in front of me. This can't be true. Sure, Easton loves me, but as a friend. Like a sister. “What did you just say?”
If Easton loves me, why would he stand by and let Jack ask me out? Why would he keep his mouth shut and never tell me how he felt?
“It doesn’t matter.” He shakes his head, dropping his gaze to the floor.
“What did you say, Easton?” I ask again.
When he doesn’t answer me, I close the distance between us and place my hand on his chest. I stare up at him, wishing he’d meet my gaze so I could see the emotions swirling in his blueish green eyes.
“It doesn’t matter. It’s never mattered,” he mutters under his breath, shaking his head.
“It does to me,” I whisper.
He squeezes his eyes shut and sucks in a deep breath. He lets it out slowly and right when I start to think he isn't going to answer me, he opens his eyes and stares deep into mine.
“I love you, Taylor.” He places his hands on my hips and holds onto me like I'm going to disappear if he doesn’t. “Not as a friend or my brother’s girlfriend. I love you the way Jack should’ve. I always have.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because you were happy with him and if I admitted my feelings, all it would’ve done is made things messy. I would’ve lost both ofyou in the process. I’d rather have you as a friend, knowing I can never have more, than to lose you entirely.”
I blink up at him as his words wash over me. He stood aside and watched me with Jack because he didn’t want to create problems. Because he wanted to keep me in his life even if it hurt him in the process.
“When? When did you fall in love with me?” I push him. I need to know.
There’s a little voice in the back of my head screaming at me. Telling me this is so important. It might be the most important question I’ve ever asked.
“I don’t know. Does it really matter?”
“Yes. I need to know. Please, Easton!” I grip his shirt in both fists and tug on it. I need an answer. I need to know if I was right all along.
“I think I was always in love with you, sweetheart. But I realized the summer you were sixteen. I told Jack I was going to ask you out. We got into a huge fight and he stormed out of the garage and knocked a bunch of things onto the ground. By the time I came out after cleaning it up, he had already asked you out and you were so excited. What was I supposed to do? I wasn’t going to beg you to choose me over him.” He lifts his shoulder in a shrug. “Inever would’ve won.”
I wrap my arms around Easton and lean my head against his chest. He doesn’t hesitate to hold me closer and drop his head to the crook of my neck.
His heart beats steadily beneath my cheek and it brings the smallest smile to my face. He’s still here. He’s still mine.
He always was mine.
“I would’ve picked you,” I whisper softly. “I would’ve picked you every time.”
Easton pulls away to meet my gaze. His eyes flicker back and forth between mine. His mind is whirling, I can almost see the wheels turning. He doesn’t believe what I'm saying.
