Page 43 of Secrets and S'mores
“I wasn’t in danger,” Hazel argues. “I wouldn’t have sparred with her if I wasn’t confident I could protect myself. You guys are over reacting.”
My gaze connects with Hazel and she gives me a small smile. For the first time, it really feels like she’s on my side.
“I can’t have you… snapping, like you said,” Slate says, fixing me with a hard stare. “What’s your plan for preventing that from happening again?”
“I will make sure I don’t lose control,” I say solemnly.
“Trying harder isn’t the answer.” Slate rubs his jaw, locking me in place with his emerald eyes. “You won’t spar again”
“But-” I start to argue.
“With anyone.” He cuts me off. “If you were a pack member, there would be a consequence.”
“It’s not her fault,” Onyx blurts.
My muscles tense as everyone turns their attention to the man beside me.
“She needs to take responsibility for what happened. And she is. What’s the problem?” Slate asks.
“She reacted that way for a valid reason,” Onyx argues. “She wasn’t trained properly. I think with enough time with my dad, that can be fixed and she’ll be fine.”
“Granite Ridge’s training methods are brutal,” Jasper agrees. “But I was trained the same and I’ve never lost control like that.”
“Funny you should say that,” Onyx growls.
It’s like my blood is turning to ice, my heartbeat fluttering out of control. I’m not sure why, but I don’t want them to know. To know how weak I was.
“What do you mean?” Hazel asks, her eyebrows pinching in concern as she regards me.
“You need to tell him. I’m very interested to know if he was aware of what was happening,” Onyx says, dropping his voice. Rage sharpens each syllable.
“No, I don’t,” I say, my voice barely catching as I tuck my legs up under me.
“Ember,” Jasper says, his voice softening. “What’s going on?”
All eyes are on me. My tight breaths aren’t getting enough oxygen into my lungs, and they begin to sting and ache. The edges of my vision blur as I study the floor.
Silence stretches on. Fabric rustles and Jasper squats down beside me, getting low until his hands come into my view. Onyx’s hand tightens around mine.
“What do I not know?” he asks. Something about his tone loosens my throat. There’s no way to keep the tears from my voice, but perhaps I can speak.
“Onyx saw some scars from the trainers from when they’d hurt me as punishment after I lost fights.” Hardly more than a harsh whisper, but the words are out there.
Every line of Jasper’s body tightens and his jaw grinds. With clipped speech, he asks, “You were included in those?”
All I can do is nod. The movement causes a tear to escape. My movements are jerky as I wipe it away with the back of my hand.
I wait for him to call me a liar. When we were children, he always won. He was four years older than me, but that didn’t seem to matter to the trainers forcing us to compete. And then he was safely at home with our parents while I faced the consequences.
Hazel slips out of her seat and returns with tissues.
“What are you guys talking about?” Slate asks.
Jasper stands, his hand brushing my shoulder as he steps back. “Granite Ridge likes to pit wolves against each other, and the loser will often get physical punishment as motivation. Some trainers take it too far.”
“Yeah, far enough to scar,” Onyx adds, his voice a physical rumble against me.
And there it is, out in the open for everyone to see. I don’t think I can take their pity. I’d prefer their judgment.
