Page 112 of Xantera
Lucan stirs within my heart. Arad freezes, his expression clouding over with an earnest confusion that makes a laugh bubble from my throat as I back away a few more steps.
“Oh, and his name!” I add. “I’d love to find out the Monster’s name so that I can moan it while I dream of him. I’m sure he’d make all mine come true.”
“Don’t taunt me,” Arad hisses. “The Monster is a cruel, mindless beast who would rip you limb from limb as soon as it sunk its claws into you.”
“No.” I smile, and my eyes flick over his head as I finally catch sight of one: a small, blinking camera jutting out from the cornice shelf of the palace dome—angled right in our direction. “The Monster would ripyoulimb from limb,” I continue, determination settling in my chest like a stone. “That’s why you built the Wall, right? Not to protect the people of Xantera, but to protectyoufrom his wrath.”
For a moment, the air strains between us, and Lucan holds his breath alongside us, suppressing all his thoughts and emotions to allow me to focus.
Then it snaps, and the facade crumbles away. No more illusions. No more pretending. Arad knows I’m aware of everything, and I won’t hide my rage anymore as I stumble backward onto the balcony gated by the spikes of the Wall.
Arad glances at my feet. His face splits into a nauseating grin at the realization that he’s backed me into the last possible corner—that there is nowhere else for me to go.
“Do you know why we built the balconies, Saskia?” he asks casually. “Not this one, but the ones in the front of the palace.”
“So that you can trick people into thinking everything’s okay with their Chosen loved ones,” I spit.
“Trick them?” He throws a hand against his heart, as if personally offended by the idea. “We’re not tricking anyone. In the back of their minds, every citizen of Xantera knows that the Choosing is wrong.” He takes a careful step toward me. “But if you make things appearjustright enough, everyone can breathe a sigh of relief and pretend they don’t have to do anything about it. They can trick themselves into believing that if no one else is speaking up about it, they don’t have to either.”
My chest squeezes as one of my feet hits a towering spike behind me. The metal digs into my spine as I flatten my back against it. “You getridof anyone who speaks up.”
Arad waves a hand, taking another leisurely step toward me as if he has all the time in the world to play with his prey—because he does. “It’s like dousing the sparks of a newborn flame.” He laughs, his fangs glinting in the sunset. “Now come back in the cage, Saskia.”
Lucan, I plead, braving a quick glimpse behind me that makes my stomach swoop at the sight of how far away the ground really is—I can hardly even see him down below, what with the thick layer of mist hugging the tree line. He’s nothing more than a shadow pacing desperately beneath me.Lucan, I’m going to…
I know, baby, he promises.I’ve got you.
Okay, I whisper back.I trust you.
And then our connection severs like someone cut it with a serrated knife.
I turn back to Arad and steel my voice. “I’m not going back into the cage.”
“I’m afraid you don’t have much of a choice.” Arad cocks his head, his tongue darting out to flick over his lips. “Whether you decide to waltz right into my arms or give me another fun little chase, I am going to drain you dry until you are just as much of a stone as your helpless mother. Well, except for your heart. The only thing that can’t turn to stone is your useless human heart, but I’ll make sure that stops beating.”
As if in response, myuseless humanheart clenches painfully, and I glance over Arad’s shoulder to lock eyes with my mother again, her lips parted in that silent scream. I wish so badly I could take her with me and breathe life back into her fossilized corpse.
“And then,” the Third Guardian continues, taking another step toward me until I’m backing up into the space between spikes, clutching each of them with a trembling hand, “I am going to come look at you every single day and stroke the frozen tears on your cheek and tell you that everything is okay, because you are safe here. With me. Forever.”
Forever. I reel in a deep breath and close my eyes for a moment, letting the breeze send strands of my hair whipping over my face. When I open them again, I chew on the words in my mouth before I spit them back out into Arad’s face.
“Go fuck yourself.”
His eyes boil with crimson hate, every part of his marble body tightening with shock. He lowers himself into a crouch, preparing to pounce.
To buy a few more seconds of precious time, I seize this moment to surprise him with the only thing I have left, the only thing I cling to for any hope, even when hope doesn’t exist.
Digging beneath my collar, I whip out the necklace and pinch the blood-red vial between my fingers, relishing the half-second of pure shock that ripples across Arad’s face.
“How?” he seethes, wide-eyed.
Which only fuels my happiness. Even in the last seconds of my life, I’m elated that I’ll drive him out of his mind for the rest of his life.
“You’ll never know. Just like your name never left my lips. And I promise, one day soon, I’m going to be your biggest nightmare. Because even when I’m dead and can’t come after you,Lucanwill.”
I take another step back, until my heels are hanging off the edge of the Wall. A piece of stone crumbles beneath the sole of my foot, plunging to the ground below.
Arad eyes my body, his gaze flicking between the necklace and my feet, understanding dawning across his face as he realizes what I’m about to do.
