Page 85 of The Heart Shot
“No,” he interrupted. “What do I have to do to prove to you that this will work? I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life. I want every day with you. I want frosting kisses, and nap cuddles, and Hallmark Christmas movies with you. I want your laugh in my ear, and your fingers in mine. I wantyou, Elsie.”
Tears glistened in his eyes, and I had to look away.
“I have to go. I need to think,” I whispered, not missing the flash of hope in his eyes that I hadn’t outright said no before it was replaced with hurt.
“Elsie…”
With a shake of my head, I slipped on my boots and crawled out of the tent, forcing myself to not look back as I headed for the sidewalk. My heart ached, and it hurt to breathe.It didn’t matter that I didn’t have a car, or that I had to walk home in the dark. Nothing mattered.
Because I left my heart, and all the feelings with it, inside the tent in Jameson’s backyard.
“You did what?” Maya screamed in the middle of Chick-Fil-A, earning annoyed looks from everyone around us.
I nibbled on a chicken nugget, not meeting her eyes after telling her how I left Jameson in that tent a week ago, sort of breaking up with him.
“Noo,” she whined, smacking the table. “Why would you do that?” She chucked a fry, and it bounced off my cheek. “He’s perfect for you.”
I scoffed, glaring at her.
“Name one thing wrong with that man.”
I huffed out a frustrated breath, not a single thing coming to mind. He wasn’t like Ben, who had more faults than redeeming qualities. Jameson had been sweet, gentle, patient, and attentive. He was everything I had always hoped Ben would be. He was everything I had once wished for. He was everything Ihadwished for beneath the stars.
“See, you can’t do it,” Maya snapped, crossing her arms.
“It doesn’t matter, Maya.”
“Yes, it does!” Maya yelled, earning more irritated looks from other customers. “You fell head over heels for him, and you just walked away without even trying!” She took an angry slurp of her Cherry Coke. “I can’t believe you.”
“And I can’t believe you told him about my parents. You had no right to do that.”
“I was trying to help you.”
“And how did that turn out?”
She shook her head, avoiding my gaze. “I can’t believe you just walked away.”
“Well, sorry to disappoint you,” I snapped, shoving an entire nugget into my mouth. I hated that I had let her down, disappointed her, but in that moment, I had been so conflicted I couldn’t even think straight. And now that a week had passed, and my thoughts were somewhat coherent again, I couldn’t bring myself to pick up the phone—to tell Jameson how I really felt.
Her face softened. “Elsie, I’m not disappointed in you so much as I’msadfor you.” She reached across the table to grab my hand. “Everyone could see there was something special between the two of you, and you just walked away.”
I shrugged, sniffling to hold back the tears.
“Sometimes love is worth taking a risk on, Els. Jameson is worth risking your heart for.” She sighed. “I told you before and I’ll tell you again. You are not your parents. They stoppedchoosingeach other. They stopped communicating and fighting for one another. That’s not you. That’s not Jameson. You’re taking the choice away from him—the choice to love you. He would never hurt you the way your parents hurt each other—or the way Ben did.”
She stopped to take a deep breath. “Look at whathe’sbeen through. He lost his dad when he was a kid, and his mom got so sick that he had to give up everything in his life to take care of her. Any normal person would have bent under that pressure, would have given up and stopped fighting. But Jameson didn’t. He did what was needed to take care of his mom and sister. He didn’t give up when things got hard. He kept fighting because that’s the kind of man he is, just like he would keep fighting for you and your relationship if you would stop being so dang stubborn.”
Then she drove the blade home. “Jameson is not fake, he’s not wearing a mask, and he’s nothing like Ben.”
“You don’t know that,” I muttered.
Maya took the chicken nugget out of my hand and slammed it down. I watched it bounce off the table and onto the floor.I wished she’d stop taking her anger out on my nuggets.
“Idoknow that. I grew up with Jameson. I’ve seen the man he’s become, and I would havenevertried to put you two together if I didn’t think it was in your best interest. You’re being a coward.”
Ouch.
Maya’s chest heaved as she glared at me, my mind spinning. Was she right? Was I so scared of turning out like my parents that it had forced me to walk away from the one thing, the one person, that gave me hope for something better?
