Page 34 of The Hanukkah Hoax
Alec swiped a hand down his face and let the cold night air carry away his curses, hoping the breeze would return with something useful, some course of action he could take that didn’t involve storming back in there and?—
Marisa laughed at whatever the man said, but the lines around her mouth weren’t the sort Alec earned each time he made her smile.
These were tense, short. Unwanted.
Alec considered the scope of his actions for only half a second before he moved. If he needed to be her boyfriend, then this fool and everyone else needed not to think otherwise, and there was only one way Alec knew to send such a message.
When he saw Alec coming, the man lifted his head and backed away from Marisa.
Good thing, too, because with all of Alec’s muscles in lockstep to get to Marisa, there was no one left upstairs in his brain to halt the train and tell him that grabbing her and kissing her in front of her family was a bad idea.
So he didn’t stop.
Chapter 14
By all objective measures, Marisa was pretty sure there was no right amount of alcohol to make a night go by faster, but she’d always prided herself on her experimental spirit. One glass of wine down, with number two in her hand, and the seeping warmth that unspooled within her veins was doing little to cast out the impending doom blanketing her. With Alec gone, even temporarily, the ruse they’d engineered felt far more fragile.
Add in her genetically spawned anxiety and Marisa was quickly spiraling from unsettled into unhinged.
Just as she was going to throw up her hands—well, her one free hand—and add some latkes to soak up the wine sloshing around nervously in her belly, a handsome man approached her. “Rumor has it you’re the famous Internet lady with some really good sugar.”
And just like that, unhinged morphed into unbelievable.
Ugh, gross. Worst opening line ever.
“That’s the rumor,” she said into her wineglass.
“I’m Jules,” he added, holding out a hand and flashing a smile that had gone a little too heavy on the whitening strips.
“Marisa.” She shook his hand, inwardly groaning at why her aunt’s neighbor had chosen that moment to show up. “You’re not one of those people who talks about gut health a lot and is oddly obsessed with the microbiome, are you? Nine times out of ten in my business, when someone starts talking to me about sugar before they even tell me their name, that’s usually the case.”
The man laughed heartily and shook his head. “Nah. Just trying to talk to someone who’s not carrying an AARP card and doesn’t seem to be perfecting their Pinot Grigio mom strut every time they hit the smoked salmon station. If I’m asked to hold one more handbag, I’m liable to start charging baggage fees.”
Against her earlier inclinations, Marisa couldn’t help but snort a laugh through her latest sip. But before she’d barely gotten through the sting of red wine singeing her nose, Jules was already holding out a napkin for her.
“Happy birthday, by the way. When your Aunt Gail invited me, I didn’t really have the heart to tell her no, especially if I was going to be living next to the woman for the foreseeable future. I mean, she cornered me when I just got back from a run and was in the middle of taking in the garbage cans. I got the sense that if I didn’t shut down the conversation real quick and appease her, she’d have me out there inspecting for visitor parking passes or asking my opinion on whether the homeowner’s association is paying too much for their snow removal contractor. I know a yenta when I see one. Besides, wouldn’t have been the first time I’ve had to make nice with the new neighbors.”
“You volunteered to go to a Hanukkah/birthday party with a bunch of people you’d never met before just so you could get away from your neighbor and back into your house as fast as possible?”
“In my defense, I was in the middle of my West Wing rewatch. After my run that morning, I was planning on eating my oatmeal while President Bartlet comforted the signalman in the hurricane. I had a fair bit on the line there. So, I’d say I didn’t so much volunteer to attend the party as was volun-told. Plus, I knew there’d be doughnuts.”
“Oh my God, I can’t watch that episode. Not unless I want to spend the entire day making sure my eyes don’t leak into my caramels.”
“Hey, you never know. Maybe selling a new batch of candies called The Signalman’s Salted Caramels might be a runaway hit.”
Marisa shared a careful, yet pleasant laugh with him before the wine unhelpfully let loose what her brain had been guarding. “I’m sorry, and I know this is going to sound the way it’s going to sound, but I was sort of under the impression that my aunt wanted to . . .” Don’t make me say it. Please, buddy, don’t make me say the words.
A humorous expression came over his face, one that played perfectly off the half-smile curving his lips. He leaned forward, grabbing her elbow and bringing his mouth to her ear. “I didn’t want to make a scene with your aunt or anything, but I’m pretty sure the guy I just started dating at my new gym would take offense.”
The peal of laughter that rattled Marisa’s lungs was so intense, she had to slam her teeth together to keep her family from thinking something was wrong or, worse, far too interesting to go a minute longer without their inspection.
And that was the last thing she needed.
“Oh, I can’t believe this,” Marisa said, shaking her head and pounding her fist against her chest to beat back the burn.
“Believe it,” Jules added, picking up a decorative dreidel nestled within a puddle of gelt on the table and spinning it for effect. “When she mentioned her niece, I knew exactly why I was being invited, but I didn’t want to be rude. And I wagered that anyone who had an aunt like yours probably needed as many distractions as possible to get them out of your business so you can have some peace. I do know what that’s like.” A sad look of commiseration highlighted his angled features, shocking Marisa even more. On anyone else, she would have found his ability to get such an accurate read on her sourness annoying, but all things considered, she didn’t mind the sympathy.
Jules took a sip of his drink. “Then you introduced your boyfriend to everyone earlier and saved me the headache of having to perform.” His eyes took on a new life. “But I had no idea you were dating him. Took me a few minutes to connect the name with the face, but I knew I’d seen him from somewhere.” Then he pulled out his phone and scrolled through a feed of photos until he landed on one and held it up to her.
