Page 147 of The Goat in the Bedroom
GRYFF
The morning started like any other Saturday, except for the fact that I'd been awake since four in the morning, the engagement ring burning a hole in my sock drawer where it had been hidden for the past three weeks.
“You're being weird,” Artie announced, emerging from our bedroom in one of my old DSU shirts and shorts that made her thighs look absolutely incredible. “Weirder than usual, I mean.”
“I'm not being weird.”
Vincent bleated from his pen outside, as if calling out my lie.
“You made breakfast,” she said, gesturing to the spread on the counter. “Like, actual breakfast. With fresh fruit arranged in a pattern.”
“It's not a pattern, it's just... organized.”
“It's a heart, Gryff. You arranged the strawberries in a heart.”
Shit. I had.
“I was feeling romantic?” I offered weakly.
She softened, coming over to wrap her arms around my waist from behind. “That's sweet. But also suspicious. What did you break?”
“Nothing.”
“Did the goats eat something important again?”
“No, they've been angels.” Mostly because Flynn had been keeping them distracted with treats all morning while secretly coordinating with half of Los Angeles via text.
My phone buzzed.
Flynn
Get her out of the house. NOW. Team's almost here.
“Hey,” I said, turning in her arms. “Want to go to the farmers market? The one in Santa Monica?”
“The one that's an hour away in Saturday traffic?”
“Yeah, but they have those honey sticks you like. And we could grab lunch at that place on the pier after.”
She studied my face, and for a moment I was sure she could see right through me. “Okay, now I know something's up. You said the seagulls there have 'organized crime energy.'”
“Maybe I've changed my mind about the seagulls.”
“Gryffen Greene Kingman.”
“Artemis Ingvar Fraser.” I hoped soon I'd be able to say Artemis Ingvar Kingman.
“Fine,” she said, but she was smiling. “Let me get dressed. But if this is some elaborate plan to avoid me finding out you signed us up for another reality show, I'm feeding you to the goats.”
While she got ready, I sent a quick text to Flynn.
Leaving in 10. You sure everyone can make it?
Flynn
Sean's coordinating LA crew. Tempest has the fam on FaceTime for instructions. Parker's got the flowers. Freddie and the rugby girls just arrived. GO.
Also Jules says to tell you she's stress-eating all your good cheese.
