Page 51 of The Goat in the Bedroom
“I love them too. I never had grandparents like that. Mine were all very... proper. Quiet.” She stretched, rolling her shoulders. “God, that scrimmage was rough though. I'm gonna have a huge bruise on my ass tomorrow.”
“You were incredible out there.”
She smiled at me, soft and pleased. “You always say that.”
“Because it's always true.”
There was a moment, standing in our kitchen, dishes half-done, her looking at me with something I couldn't quite read in her eyes. The air felt charged, like the moment before our eye contact exercises, but without the excuse of practice.
“Do you think we should move on to more, umm, intimate exercises? I didn't feel too off-kilter or awkward with anythingthis week. Although you surprised me with that hand holding thing.” she said finally.
“Yeah,” I agreed, dying inside that this was still just practice to her. “Whatever you need.”
I watched her walk away, heading to bed, and once again felt like I'd missed the perfect opportunity to tell her what was in my heart.
I went to bed too, but I couldn't sleep and went to the kitchen for water and found Nana sitting at the island with a cup of tea.
“Couldn't sleep either?” I asked.
“Old habits.” She patted the stool next to her. “Sit with me.”
I sat, and we were quiet for a moment before she spoke.
“That girl doesn't know you're in love with her.”
“Nana—“
“I see how you're trying to show her. The hand holding, the cotton candy, the way you watch her play like she hung the moon.” She sipped her tea. “But, sweetheart, sometimes you have to use words.”
“She doesn't see me that way.”
“Doesn't she? Or have you just not given her the chance?” She stood, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “Don't wait too long, Gryffen. The things we don't say have a way of becoming the things we regret.”
She left me sitting in the dark kitchen, thinking about all the moments from this week. How natural it felt holding Artie's hand at the pier. How she'd looked for me after that tackle. How she fit perfectly in my life, my home, my family.
Tomorrow was our first preseason game. Artie would be there watching me play professionally for the first time. Maybe if she saw me in my element, doing what I was born to do, maybe she'd finally see ME.
Or maybe I'd just keep torturing myself with trust exercises and stolen moments, pretending to teach her how to be with other men while dying to show her she should be with me.
I stood in my dark kitchen, in the house I shared with the woman I loved, with my grandparents asleep down the hall, and wondered how much longer I could keep this up.
The answer, I knew, was as long as she needed me to.
Even if it killed me.
BLACK & BLUE AND HARD ALL OVER
ARTEMIS
The bruise on my ass was the size of a dinner plate and roughly the color of a ripening eggplant.
I twisted around in front of the mirror in my bathroom, trying to get a better look at the damage from the scrimmage. The bruise extended from just below my butt cheek down to mid-thigh, a spectacular purple Rorschach that hurt like hell. But it had totally been worth it.
What I needed was a good long soak in a hot bath. What I had was a shower stall that definitely wasn't designed for therapeutic soaking.
But Gryff's master bathroom? That had a tub that could probably fit three people comfortably, with jets and everything.
He was at practice for another hour and his grandparents were off visiting Jules for the day. I had the perfect amount of time for an Epsom salt and bubble bath. He wouldn't mind.
