Page 109 of The Infiniteness of Yesterday
I finally manage to get it on and turn to check on her.
“Are you still okay?” I ask.
She nods where she lies on the bed. “I’m okay. I promise. I just want you.”
I settle over top of her and make sure she’s as ready as she can be. No matter what, I know this first time isn’t going to be the best for her.
When I push inside her, her face squishes in pain and I stop.
“No!” she cries out. “Keep going.”
“But—”
“No.” She holds my eyes. “It won’t get better if you don’t.”
I hate causing her more pain, but I keep going a little at a time until I’m all the way inside her.
Her nails dig into the backs of my arms. “Just give me a minute.”
“Okay.” I grit my teeth.
In less than a minute, she nods. “I’m okay.”
I take it gentle and slow, wanting it to be as good as it possibly can be for her, and when it’s over, and she curls into my body, I know that if I thought I was a goner for her before, it has nothing on how I feel now.
CHAPTER 40
HARLOW
Jameson doesn’t want to be at the apartment when Spencer drops off Roe and I can’t say I blame him.
When the knock on the door comes, I save my work and close my computer.
There’s another, more impatient knock, that I know belongs to Monroe.
Shaking my head and trying not to laugh, I open the door.
“Hey, Monster,” I greet, bending down to hug my daughter. Her cast should be coming off in another week or two if all goes well—which is probably for the best, because it hasn’t slowed her down one bit and it’s covered in grime. The once vibrant pink is much more muted now.
“Hi, Mom.” She hugs me back. “I have to check on my friends,” she says, letting me go and heading toward her room and horde of stuffed animals. I once tried to weed out some of her less played with stuffies, but she caught on to me before I could drop them off for donation.
Standing, I make eye contact with Spencer and give him a smile, but I think it must be more of a grimace based on the curious look he gives me.
“Is everything okay?” he asks.
I shake my head, wrapping my arms around myself. “I told Jameson about the kiss.”
Spencer nods, a muscle in his jaw pulsing. He slides his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “And how did he take it?”
I swallow past the lump in my throat and turn away from Spencer, busying myself by picking up my snacks from the coffee table.
“He’s hurt.”
Spencer nods, eyes focused on my ceiling like it holds the answers to every question he’s ever had. “Understandable.”
I spin towards him, arms filled with wrappers and my collection of cups—one for lemon water, an iced coffee that I half drank, and a can of sparkling water.
“That can never happen again,” I hiss.
