Page 133 of The Infiniteness of Yesterday
I can’t lie to her, so I say nothing instead.
She claps her hands together. “I knew this was going to happen one day.”
“It was an accident,” I groan, covering my face.
Poppy laughs. “Sex is never an accident. Especially not with your hot as sin baby daddy. So, tell me, how many times did you accidentally fall on his dick?”
“I lost count.”
Her mouth pops open. “Jesus. That much?”
I nod. “I dropped Roe off at my parents in the early afternoon and I don’t know what happened, but instead of doing my homework like I planned, I showed up at his house instead and?—”
“Let baby daddy fuck your brains out? Good for you.”
She holds her hand up for a high-five and I ignore it, so she gives herself one instead.
“You should not be cheering this on,” I hiss. “I have a boyfriend.”
She shrugs. “It’s a new era—fuck ‘em both at the same time.”
“Poppy,” I blurt in shock.
“What? They’re both hot as fuck. Maybe they wouldn’t be opposed to it. You never know unless you ask.” She holds her hand out, examining her neon orange nails. Lowering her hand, she says, “In all seriousness, I love Jameson. He’s a great guy and he’s good for you, but Spencer is … listen, anytime he’s around, you two are like magnets being drawn together. It’s incredible to watch, truly. I’ve never seen anything like it. It’s kind of impossible not to cheer the guy on when he so openly pines for you”
“You’re not helping,” I gripe.
Letting out a sigh, she says, “If you want me to tell you that you’re a horrible person and how dare you do this, then I certainly can, but something tells me you’re already beating yourself up enough about this whole thing without me piling on top of you.”
She has a solid point.
I frown and toy with the straps of my apron wrapped around my waist. “I don’t know who I’ve become,” I confess.
Poppy yanks me into a bone-crushing hug. “You’re my friend, that’s who you are.”
“I’ve fucked up,” I tell her, exhaling a heavy breath. “I’m going to have to tell Jameson and that will be the end of us and I … I don’t know if I can truly say if Spencer is who I want either. Besides,” I groan, tugging my hair out of my low bun so I can redo it. “It’s not a competition.”
Poppy tsks in sympathy. “Here’s my advice—don’t make any rash decisions or run home and tattle on yourself to Jameson. Give yourself some space and time to think.”
“Yeah.” I nod. “That makes sense.”
At least I think it does.
She gives my elbows a squeeze. “We better get back to work. Poor Pablo can’t fare much longer on his own.”
I swipe a bottle of water and gulp down a few sips to coat my parched throat. “All right, let’s go.”
Jameson: Hey, I’m working late again tonight so I’ll just crash at my place.
The text should come as a relief that I don’t have to face him tonight, but if anything it sends me into a larger spiral, questioning if perhaps somehow, he knows.
Closing my eyes, I lean my head back against the headrest. A tear leaks out of the corner of my eye. If you’d asked me even a year ago if I would ever cheat on my boyfriend I would’ve told you no with my whole chest and been offended at the very thought. Within just a few months I’ve completely obliterated who I thought I was.
Taking a few deep breaths, I open my eyes and reply.
Me: That’s okay! Miss you.
Jameson: I shouldn’t be as busy tomorrow.
