Page 171 of The Infiniteness of Yesterday
The three of us get out, and I let them take a moment to appreciate the view.
As we head inside, they continue to look around in awe. We follow the noise to the kitchen where Spencer is with his parents and Roe. She dips a carrot in ranch and eyes our little group.
“You guys are so slow. I’m glad I didn’t wait for you.”
I notice there are a few other people gathered around and Spencer points them out. “This is Liam.” He points to the extremely good-looking man with dark wavy hair and intense eyes. “And his wife Ari.” She’s striking with olive-skin, nearly black hair, and bright blue eyes. “And over here we have Ollie and Talia. They’re married too.”
It hits me then that Liam isn’t just someone random. He’s LiamWade—son of the lead singer of Willow Creek—and famous surfer. Even though I’ve heard his name numerous times from Spencer, it took a moment for the details to click into place.
As for the other couple, I don’t recognize them at all, and something tells me they’re not famous. I suppose it shouldn’t surprise me that Spencer has normal friends, but I think because he’s constantly surrounded by insanely popular celebrities, I thought he’d fall easily into that lifestyle and what seems like shallow so-called friendships. I guess, in a way, I’ve never given him enough credit.
With the introductions out of the way, people chat and get to know each other while snacking on some of the spread Spencer has laid out. I stay on the recesses of the group, just watching.I’m not sure I have it in me to participate, but at least I’m here, so that has to count for something, right?
I’m not surprised when Spencer’s mom extracts herself from the group after saying hello to everyone and comes over to my side.
“Hi, Harlow.” She smiles kindly, opening her arms for a hug. “How are you?”
I hug her, though it feels awkward and I don’t quite know what to do with my hands. She squeezes me tight like she’s missed me. I can’t fathom her being happy to see me. It makes no sense.
“I’m good,” I reply, probably a few seconds too late, yet again making it awkward. “You?”
“Good, I’m good. I’ve been volunteering some, so that’s keeping me busy.”
“Oh, that sounds wonderful. I’m happy to hear that.” I paste on a smile, nodding in what’s probably a robotic way, but I can’t seem to control my neck.
“I truly am happy to see you here.” She reaches out, rubbing my arm in what I assume is supposed to be a comforting gesture.
“I’m glad I … we could come.”
“Monroe talks about you all the time,” she says.
I burst into laughter. “Is that so? I swear she can’t wait to get away from me and to her dad.”
She gives me a sympathetic smile. “She loves you both so much.”
“She’s a good kid. The best.”
And I guess that’s what I need to focus on. Even though I’ve wanted to dwell on my mountain of bad decisions, the truth is, the thing that matters most is Monroe and she’s a fucking awesome kid.
“I just want to say to you”—oh, God. I swallow down my fear over whatever she might say next— “my son loves you verymuch. He’s never stopped. But I know you’ve been through a lot, getting pregnant and having a baby young, Spencer’s career, and what’s happened recently.” I squish my eyes shut. God, it’s incredibly embarrassing that those photos are out there and everyone I know, not only knows I cheated on my boyfriend—fiancé—but they’ve seen us in such a vulnerable position. “And I just want to say, that despite how much he loves you, you have to do what’s best for you. He told me you were taking time to figure things out on your own and I think that’s great.”
“Um … thanks?” It comes out as a question, and she laughs.
“No, I mean it. You started dating my son so young and after you guy broke up it wasn’t too long before you found Jameson. It sounds like it’ll be good for you to be single for a while. Find yourself. Something I believe, is we can’t truly love another person until we’ve found ourselves.”
“That’s an excellent point.”
She grabs my hand and gives the top of it a gentle pat. “I know it might be awkward to talk to me, but I just want you to know I’m here if you need it. Okay?”
“Thanks.”
Fuck. I’m going to cry.
She gives me another quick hug before going back to join the others.
No one’s paying any attention to me, so I quickly slip away and find the nearest room to duck into. It’s what can only be considered a library. It’s small with dark shelves filled with books, a warm rust colored rug covering the light floors, and two large leather chairs.
I ease the door shut behind me and let the tears fall.
