Page 52 of When We Ignite
I found myself stuck with Hanna and Felicia again, forced to listen to them chatter about their lives while pretending I wasn’t still spiraling over Sebastian. Every word he’d said earlier played on a loop in my head, feeding my worst fears. He regretted this—regrettedme.
And now I was screwed.
All I could picture was a lifetime of family functions, catching glimpses of him across the room and remembering how close I’d been, how badly I’d messed it up. It would be excruciating.
Eventually, Henry and Sebastian came out, talking and keeping their distance from us. Sebastian was chain-smoking, and Henry was oddly serious. The girls—Hanna and Felicia—invited me to a party they were attending at a friend’s house. I declined, but they gave me their numbers, asking me to reconsider.
By the time we got back to the house, things had only gotten worse. Sebastian disappeared into the office with his father and brothers while I found myself drifting—reluctantly—toward Charlotte and my mother. I tried to focus on the wedding planning and whatever else they were discussing, but my mind was elsewhere.
It was on him.
I replayed everything, over and over, analyzing every word, every glance—wishing I could take it all back.
But even if I found the courage to talk to him and apologize, what could I possibly say? “Sorry for freaking out again. I swear I’ll stop being a walking contradiction”? That would only confirm what he’d said—that I was just some kid who couldn’t make up his mind.
And if I did apologize, wouldn’t that mean letting him kiss me? The idea sent my nerves into overdrive. I thought I wanted it—Ididwant it—but what if I hated it? I’d never kissed a guy before. What if my attraction to him was just because ofwhohe was, and the reality didn’t live up to the fantasy?
If that happened, he’d hate me, and things would be even worse. We’d be stuck awkwardly avoiding each other for years.
By late afternoon, Sebastian and the others had moved to the terrace. I could see him from the living room, his posture stiff as he stared out at the horizon. The distance between us felt insurmountable, and I couldn’t take it anymore.
Grabbing my phone, I scrolled through my contacts until I found Hanna and Felicia’s numbers.
“Hey,” I said when one of them picked up. “About that party…I’m in.”
CHAPTER NINE
ETHAN
Four hours later, back at the house, I was a man with a plan. Or at least a man executing Felicia’s brilliant plan.
I really hadn’t given her and Hanna enough credit before. They were smarter than they let on, and after about six tequila shots, I found myself spilling everything—how I was trying to go out with a man and kept psyching myself out. Four shots after that, they’d figured out it was Sebastian and were fully on board with helping me.
Their plan was simple: I just needed to be drunk—or, as Felicia put it, “buzzed enough to turn the jitters into action.” It wasn’t that bad. I could hold myself up. Mostly.
I peeked out onto the terrace. Sure enough, they were still out there. Sebastian looked…unreal. How did someone look so good at the end of the day? Loose linen shirt, tailored shorts, like he stepped out of some ad for “rich people who don’t sweat.” Even his clothes seemed defiant of reality—perfectly pressed in a way that made me wonder if he snuck away to get steamed during the day.
I closed my eyes and tried to focus.The plan. Right.
Tiptoeing upstairs, I slipped into his room and shut the door behind me, exhaling in relief. Step one: complete. Now came the waiting, which was—unsurprisingly—miserable.
I couldn’t sit still, and lying back made the room spin like I was trapped on a tilt-a-whirl. Pulling out my phone, I decided to text him.
Me
when are you going to bed?
It’s past midnight
I stared at the screen, the glow making my head swim, until his reply popped up.
Ash Langley
I didn’t realize I had a bedtime
I chuckled to myself. Yes, clever as always. Fucking Sebastian Langley. I snapped a picture of his bedroom door and almost sent it but paused. All the doors probably looked the same. My gaze landed on a picture hanging on the wall, so I took a photo of that instead and sent it.
Ash Langley
