Page 54 of When We Ignite
“I do! I just—” my voice cracked, “—you make me nervous, okay? I can’t think around you. You’re so…you. And I’m?—”
“Amazing,” he interrupted, a faint smile softening his expression. “You’re amazing, Ethan. What’s not to like?”
I shook my head. “I’m a mess. You’re right—I can’t make up my mind, and I know you’re going to get bored. I’m sorry. I thought this would fix it, and now you’re probably even more annoyed with me.”
“Ethan,” he said gently, calling my attention back to his gaze. “I’m not annoyed with you.”
“I know you are. I don’t know how to act around you. You probably don’t believe me—I’m not usually an awkward fuck.”
He chuckled, his smile brightening his face. Brightening the fucking room.
“See? You’re like the sun, and I keep messing up.”
His smile faltered. “You’re not messing anything up. I told you I wasn’t going to pressure you, and I’m doing it. I know I’m overwhelming you.”
“No, you just want something quick and easy, and I’m making it a million times more complicated.”
“Ethan,” he said, shaking his head.
I just needed to get this over with. Moving back into his space, I reached for his neck and managed to plant a kiss on his cheek before he turned away. “I thought you wanted this.”
“I do want you, just not like this.” The low rumble of his voice vibrated in my chest, somehow magnifying his presence.
“I don’t know how to do it any other way. What do you need me to do? You told me you wanted control. Didn’t I give it to you? Why aren’t you taking it?”
Sebastian closed his eyes—definitely annoyed.
Finally, he cupped my face between his palms. “I’m sorry I confused you today,” he said patiently. “I’m not mad at you, darling. You can take more time if you need it, and I can keep talking you through it, but right now, I need to get you back to your room.”
My eyes flicked to his lips and I watched, mesmerized, as they twitched into a small, rueful smile.
“I promise I’ll kiss you the next time you ask me to. You don’t have to be scared of me, and you don’t have to force yourself to do things you’re not ready for. I’m not going anywhere. You’re going to be my brother-in-law in a couple of months. I’m literally not going anywhere.”
I chuckled through the embarrassment. “Can you hug me again?”
He nodded, pulling me into his arms. I sighed into the embrace.
“I really should get a prize for this.”
I laughed, wrapping my arms around his waist.
“Thank fuck it didn’t occur to you to take your clothes off,” he added.
I rolled my eyes at myself. I’d forgotten that part of the plan.
My stomach began to feel unsettled. “I feel a little sick,” I admitted.
Sebastian sighed, his lips curved into an attractive grin. “Come on, menace. Let’s get you to your room.”
Sebastian helped me up and guided me there, his arm steadying as my legs wobbled. I closed my eyes when we reached it, swallowing hard and leaning my head against the doorframe. Surely, this couldn’t get more embarrassing.
“Are you okay?” he asked, his warm hand resting gently on my shoulder.
I shook my head, wincing at the motion. “No. I’m really starting to feel sick,” I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper.
He rubbed soothing circles on my back. “Get in. I’ll grab you some water.”
I nodded, stepping into the room and sinking onto the bed. Sebastian didn’t follow but left the door open, his footsteps fading down the hall. Pressing my hand against my churning stomach, I realized it was about to get worse. Much worse.
