Page 190 of Becoming Us
It was, hands down, the most fucking wholesome day of my life.
We took pictures, got Seattle T-shirts, and Lan told Atty a bunch of embarrassing stories from my childhood—thankfully sparing me the more explicit teenage ones. They hit it off, and for most of the day, Atty’s hand was laced with mine.
Back at the hotel, he showered first. When I stepped under the water, all I felt was relief. Relief that this weekend hadn’t ended in a fight or a breakup. Relief that I had my sister back. Relief that maybe—just maybe—I could start handing off some of the weight that had been crushing me for years.
Most of all, relief that I felt like myself again. Not Party-Noah. Not Addict-Noah. Not Pining-Ex-Noah. Just…me.
The version of me that might’ve existed before if I hadn’t spent so much of my life bitter and jaded. The kind of person who could enjoy the simple things. Who could exist in a moment like today and actually feel like he belonged.
It was so easy, so freeing, that I started to wonder if I’d been the problem all along. Maybe I’d kept myself in that dark hole, convinced I couldn’t get out. It wasn’t the first time that thought had come for me, and I knew it wouldn’t be the last.
But this time, I told it to fuck off.
Fuck off and let me have this moment. Because I wanted it. I wanted the small things. I wanted love. And he was right there, on the other side of the door, waiting for me.
Walking out of the shower with my robe still clinging to damp skin, I instinctively moved toward the closet to get dressed. But I stopped when I saw him.
I took a step toward him, not bothering with clothes. Another step—not second-guessing, not thinking it through. Another, knowing we belonged to each other. That this was ours.
I stepped in front of him, knowing—really knowing—that this man loved me. The real me. Exactly as I was in this moment. Just as much as I loved him.
When I reached him, I took his phone gently from his hand and dropped it on the bed. His eyes lifted to mine, pale and curious, and something soft pulled at my chest. A smile tugged at my lips as I climbed into his lap, looping my arms around hisneck and settling against him like we were puzzle pieces meant to click.
“Hey,” I whispered, brushing my lips over the droplets on his skin. “Did you have fun today?”
“Yeah, I did,” he said, a little breathless as I shifted closer.
I nibbled his ear, inhaling that perfect Atty scent until it filled every corner of my brain. “Wanna do something else that’s fun?”
His low chuckle vibrated between us. His hands dropped to cup my ass, pulling me against him until no space remained. “Yeah?”
I nodded, fingers twisting in the damp hair at his nape as I nuzzled his nose with mine. Our gazes locked, and heat flared to life between us. “Yeah.”
Then I tugged his hair, pushing him back onto the bed. There was no time to think, no need to pause. Our lips met in a kiss that was hungry and deep and lingering all at once.
I didn’t want to rush this. I wanted to live in it.
But I also wanted to take it. And from the way he kissed me back, surrendering, so did he.
I didn’t break away from his lips as I shrugged off my robe, letting it fall from me while his hands explored every new inch of skin. They were everywhere—skating down my back, tracing the sharp lines of my spine, gliding over my chest.
One finger trailed over my scar—not fearful, not hesitant. Just love. His knuckles brushed my stomach, reverent and slow, before they slid down to grip my hips and pull me closer.
I tugged on his towel, pulling it open so our bodies could truly press together. At the first glide of his cock against mine, we groaned into each other’s mouths.
“What do you want to do?” he whispered against my lips.
“Get your dick in me,” I said with a smile, watching his eyes widen just slightly.
Atty was already panting, lips parted and slick with spit—but beneath the heat, there was something else. Hesitation.
“What?”
His eyes flicked away. “Nothing. Just need lube.”
I clocked it. I’d ask him about it later—whatever it was.
“Nightstand.” I nodded toward it.
