Page 77 of Her Beast of a Duke
“Heavens,” Oscar laughed, and the sound was deep and honest, and Isabella thought she would get drunk on it more than the wine he poured her. “So, you have always scandalized men, then?”
“I would not call itthat,” she giggled. “My mama had a lot of say in my ways during my Seasons. It was alwaysdo this, do that, be like Hermia, Hermia ought to be teaching you better, more proper ways.She always pushed me to marry quickly, especially after Hermia’s scandal.”
Oscar frowned, nodding. Isabella was careful to skirt around the subject of her first fiancé, for she did not want to invite a mention of him into such an intimate space.
“If you do not mind my saying,” he said, “that is why I wanted to wait for you on the terrace just now. There have been unpleasant moments for you on balconies as of late, and I wanted you to at least be on a terrace with one man who cares?—”
He cut himself off right before he admitted to caring about her, but Isabella continued to look at him with hope.
“Well,” he muttered, “you know my feelings.”
“Do I?” she smirked, turning her attention to the main course of their dinner.
“I would imagine the coupling we did last night, and the morning before that, and then in the bathroom, says quite enough.”
“Oh, I do not know,” she mused playfully. “I might have to be reminded several times a day.”
“Per day?” His eyebrows rose up, and he laughed roughly. “Then I ought to stop my exercising in the woods, for you might just work my body enough in that case.”
“Perhaps I can.” Her lashes lowered, and she peered up at him from beneath them. Before he could pursue her across the tableas the dark expression on his face suggested he wanted to, Isabella cut into her meat, bringing it to her lips.
“You are right,” she said, tasting it, changing the topic purposefully. “This meat is very expensive and exquisite.”
Her husband’s fingers tightened where he gripped the edge of the table. “You are a tease, Isabella, and whenyouare ready to stop teasing, I shall have you begging for what you want.”
Heat curled through her stomach, and she bit her lip, forcing herself to continue meeting his gaze where he would expect her to look away bashfully. There was something about their newfound intimacy that was emboldening her, she thought.
Finally, he joined her in eating their food, but after a moment that seemed heavy with thought, he asked her a question she was not prepared for.
“What do you enjoy doing when it rains and you are stuck inside?”
“What do you mean?”
Oscar’s expression was hard to read, and she could not figure out where the question came from. She tilted her head at him. “Humor me. I have wondered this for a while.”
“You continue to be an enigma to me,” she laughed, frowning down at the table, thinking. “Well, I read, of course. I despiseembroidery, but my mother always told me that rainy days without social calls were perfect for practice. I was never very good at it. Sibyl is, though.”
“You speak of your sisters often, but not yourself.” He gave her a long look over the rim of his wineglass. “I am asking aboutyou.Let yourself be known, Isabella.”
And that mere invitation possibly meant more than she realized. For somebody to ask her to take off a performative mask, an avoidant one, and let her true self be known. She could only blink for a moment as thoughts of how she had kept herself occupied behind closed doors.
“It is foolish,” she muttered, waving it off. “Uninteresting and?—”
“I still wish to know.”
Isabella swallowed. “I daydream. It sounds very simple and silly, but I can occupy myself for a very long time getting lost in my thoughts. I daydream about pretty things, beautiful things, and I do not mean the jewelry my mother once made me wear as she paraded me through one ballroom after another. I mean emotionally beautiful things. Everything was always about matching, whether one liked the company of her match or not, so I let myself imagine a life where that match loved me.
“A life where I could take off every damned mask my mother pressed to my face and told me to woo my suitors to elevate our family name. A life where… a life where love bloomed effortlessly. I have always claimed to have no time for romance,have always forced myself to scoff at Sibyl’s openness, but secretly, I am just jealous that she had the allowance to explore her fondness for romance and whimsy.”
“And you were not?”
Isabella shook her head. “Not after Hermia’s scandal, even before that. When she was labeled a spinster, it shamed our family greatly, and my mother already had me preened to be the next diamond of her daughters.” Her voice dropped to a whisper, and she felt as though she was peeling away too many layers of herself as she confessed in a whisper, “I have spent my whole life pretending, and there were days when I feared I lost myself in those pretenses. So much so that I stopped recognizing myself in the mirror.”
“And now?”
“Now…” The smile that began to form wasn’t one she fought to let appear. “Now, I find myself not needing to pretend. Now, I believe I recognize the Isabella I see.”
“I recognize her,” he told her, still holding her gaze with such intensity that her heart fluttered. “I see who she is, and I’m rather fond of that lovely lady. I see your masks, but I see the woman beneath, and both of them urged me to continue seeing my proposal to you through.”
